The Worn: A Cloti Story
by rainydaykisses
Summary: Cloud reaches for the words that will make Tifa stay but will a deal with a devil named Scarlet save Reno's fledgling relationship with her? Cloti Renti Yuffentine
1. Prelude

**disclaimer: If I owned FFVII or any of its characters, there would be a game sequel by now.. but there isn't, is there.. therefore, I do NOT own anything.**

**Prelude**

A sudden splash in the distance broke through her quiet reverie. Uncertain of what she should anticipate, she rose from the flowerbed and took her brass knuckles out of her back pocket. Sliding them on had become a ritual, always presaging a bloody end. Contrary to what the people closest to her thought, she was not a fighter. She fought out of necessity, to protect herself, those she loves, and her beliefs.. it was never a desire of hers to feel as powerful and deadly as she knew she had become. In fact, she regretted it had been her only choice. She felt somehow less human, less vulnerable and mortal than she knew life was… this above all, saddened her. Briefly, she wondered if Aeris had felt the same – perhaps that was why Aeris chose to stop fighting and just take the alternate route available only to her – to stop all the fighting once and for all. Mulling over these thoughts as she peered at the metal fitted for her hands in her grasp, she could not bring herself to put them on once again. She slipped them away into her back pocket. She'd rather run than fight today.

As she started to slink off, a voice rung out – unintelligible but familiar. She silently made her way to the back of the church, pressed herself to the wall, and peered slowly around the corner. There he was.

He stood in the middle of a clear pool of water, naked to the waist and staring at his own reflection. The pale flesh stretched across his chest glistened with beads of water. Cobalt eyes full of grief and blond hair splayed permanently in all directions. A human compass… her very own magnetic pull. His heavy sword hung loosely in his grip, water rippling around the sharp steel beside him, his easy grasp of it making him look all the more deadly.

She felt white heat strike her, hard. Blushing with the fantastic imagery that flitted before her mind, she tried to pull her eyes from his image. Her whole being ached with love, desire, and despair as one question pricked her mind: would she be ever unable to cut herself all the way down the middle – severing in half the one whole that should have been them? Ever unable to find the second half of her in some other – matching apple to apple?

A sharp, cold sensation deep inside of her stomach told her she would not. That even if she finally could fight no longer for him, she'd never be able to stop her heart from calling out for him… til at last there'd be nothing within but an echo of his name.

"Cloud."

Her lips whispered unintentionally. Slowly, he looked up from the placid water, sank to his knees within the pool and murmured, "What am I supposed to do now?" He had felt sure he'd been given a second chance, a chance to rewrite the ending of his story, a chance to live it like he would've chosen to – but he'd never much considered what he actually wanted before – just what he felt he must do. He'd acted only out of necessity for so long, he'd forgotten what it was that he used to dream about before all the nightmares.

Cloud sunk even further into the shimmering water of the pool, easing his weary body into it until he floated on his back. The cool liquid encircled him – he felt vulnerable and secure at the same time. After his whole world had been dictated for him, now he'd have the chance to take his own path? And so he sighed again… "what now?"

Tifa witnessed his musings in silence, solemnity tugging down her lips. Even as everything inside of her demanded him, pleaded for him, whimpered for him, she took a deep breath, turned, and walked home.


	2. Chapter 1 First Reason

_Author's note: If you've skipped the Prelude, go back!! IT'S GOOD!_ _I pROMISE! (well, at least I think it is..)It's not a review of anything, it just puts into place where Cloud and Tifa's minds are at this point and I think it's important to the story. So, yonde kudasai! (Translation: Read, please!)_

_Plot Summary: After AC, Cloud is home for good, and Tifa is beginning to feel the pressure of having her heart's unsung hero constantly around her. Fighting off her temptations, she struggles to remember why she and Cloud can never be._

**disclaimer: It's so so sad that I don't own any of the rights to FFVII... if I did, all sorts of interesting things could happen. (T_T)  
**

**Chapter 1 – First Reason**

The worn, wooden floors of 7th Heaven were dimly lit with soft blue light. Stumbling through the back with a couple of cumbersome boxes in her arms, Tifa strained to peer over the top of her armload, just managing to see that she had yet to lock the bar door.

"Dammit!" She muttered to herself and set down the boxes on the bar. Tifa sighed, _Somehow I knew I forgot to lock that door._ She quickly strolled over and turned the deadbolt with a satisfying click. She paused a moment, staring out the door window. Her face softened from its grimace into a smile, both content and sad._ Fenrir,_ the girl thought, staring at the black motorcycle through the door window. It gleamed beneath the streetlight in front of 7th Heaven. Tifa wistfully rubbed the smooth brass doorknob her hand hovered over.

_I wonder if he still remembers the time he took me for a ride? I wonder if he thinks of it when he rides alone, ever…_ With an irritated scowl, Tifa reached up, still staring out the window at the bike that filled up so many of her memories, and quickly pulled down the blinds. _Probably not._ She turned, gazed dully at the boxes on the bar and suddenly felt too tired to unpack the liquor inside of them. "I'll do it tomorrow," she grumbled quietly, shaking off feelings of guilt.

Tifa walked around to the back, and turned the corner, taking one last glance at the bar. Everything looked normal, so she headed up the stairs to go to sleep.

_**BaNNG!!**_ She stopped, surprised, and jogged up the rest of the steps towards the noise. Mildly alarmed, she swung open the door to Denzel's and Marlene's room, and calmed when she saw them both sleeping soundly. She quietly shut the door, and turned to look down the hall at the door to Cloud's room. _Cloud…?_ Ignoring how tense her muscles were, she headed slowly down the hall. Her hand rested on the doorknob, heart thudding thickly in her ears, and she slowly opened the door.

"Cloud?" Tifa softly called, peering in through the crack of the doorway. She didn't see anything. She opened the door the rest of the way, and cautiously looked around the dark room. Nothing. Just a bunch of rumpled bed sheets, but no Cloud. There was golden light glowing behind the door to Cloud's bathroom. The faint sound of the shower could be heard. _Oh,_ Tifa breathed. She approached the door and lightly knocked. Probably dropped the soap. "Cloud?" she paused, waiting for an answer. Feeling a little foolish, she opened the door and a rush of steam encircled her.

"Geez, Cloud, you could do a girl a favor and answer her when she's looking for you. At this rate, how are you ever going to – " she stopped mid-playful sentence and gasped. "Cloud!" She ran to him. His body was slumped over on the tile floor, his shock of blonde spikes hung limply in front of his face, dripping wet. Tifa fell to her knees beside him and raised his head off the floor, onto her lap. A purple bruise was already beginning to swell on the right side of his head. It must've been a hard fall, she thought sympathetically.

Calling to him gently, she stared at his face for any flicker of movement. Biting her bottom lip, Tifa mumbled, "I guess the first thing I should do is get him off this cold floor." Thanking god he had a towel tucked around his waist, Tifa reached up and turned the shower off. His cheeks were a faint pink from the steam, and even in this situation she couldn't help but stare at his masculine beauty. Hoisting him off the floor as she stood up, his body helplessly leaned into her side and his head drooped onto her shoulder. She could feel the muscles in Cloud's arms and obliques bite into her flesh from the weight of him against her. Catching her breath, Tifa carefully stepped forward, avoiding the puddle that had collected on the floor beneath him. For some reason, she felt really shaky, and counted her steps under her breath to focus as she walked him towards his bed. One, two…thhhree…four… The bathroom door was open enough to shed a triangular arc of golden light on his bed, and she felt her legs wobble with every step towards it. _God, he's heavy!_

Mid-step, something almost noiselessly dropped to the floor. Looking down, she recognized it as Cloud's towel, and a jolt of warmth spread throughout her body as she snapped her head back up. Staring hard at the bed, she heaved them both forward and wondered why her eyes felt as if they were being pulled down beyond her control.

Finally, she reached the side of his low bed. Although tempted to dump Cloud onto it and run out, Tifa tried lowering his body down onto the bed gently._ 'There you go,'_ Tifa pushed him from her body. As she leaned over the bed, his weight shifted away too quickly and pulled her down with him. _GWAA!_ She landed, hard, against his naked body.

Tifa quickly looked up at his sleeping, peaceful face in dismay. He didn't stir. Sighing with relief,_ 'how would I ever explain this?'_ Tifa started to lift herself up. With a jolt, her whole body tensed and she found she couldn't move. Breathing heavily, she felt the unmistakable pressure of an erection pressing into one of her thighs. An odd sensation traveled up her spine, immobilizing her and making her go light headed. Without stopping to think, her eyes ran down his broad shoulders, his pecs, his ripped abs, and the carved V in his flesh – where his abs met his hips, and….

Cloud groaned, and Tifa snapped her head back up to stare at his face. He threw a heavy arm around her neck and pressed her into him. Her lips came crashing down onto the side of his mouth, and before she knew it, he'd turned his head to her face and blinked, his cerulean eyes bright even in the shadowy room. "Uh… heh heh… It's a funny story, really…" Tifa started weakly. Cloud silently gazed at her face with a soft expression she'd never seen in his eyes before, and tenderly kissed her lips, before setting his head back down on his pillow and closing his eyes. Tifa's eyes went wide, her heart in her throat. Her lips tingled with his taste.

"Aeris…" he whispered, dreamily. A sharp pang of envy and guilt gnashed at Tifa's heart. It thud impossibly slowly in her ears, and in agony, she thought her chest would burst. Slowly, she climbed up off of him, fetched his towel from the floor, and while gazing mournfully at his beautiful face, wrapped it around his waist once more. He'd been injured worse and survived. "Good night, Cloud…" she murmured behind her shoulder and gently closed the door.


	3. Chapter 2 Confounded Towel!

_Author's note: Hey guys! Hope you liked the first two chapters, and since this is the second update in a day, you OWE me. So read my confounded towel chapter, then hit that little button at the end that says "Review", and tell me about how great the story is, how it sucks worse than the suckiest piece of fanfic you've ever read, or how it's ok but needs improvement and then tell me why. Thank you thank you sankkkkyuuuu!! (by the way, even in my own opinion it gets much better as it goes… guess it takes me some time to build momentum, (^_^;) hee hee.) _

**Disclaimer: Nothing is mine except this story.**

Chapter 2 – Confounded Towel!

The door creaked open. Tifa blinked and sat up in her bed, "Wha-". Cloud stood in her doorway with a smirk on his face, the light blue towel loosely hanging from his hips. He raised his left arm above his head and leaned the back of his elbow against the doorframe, scratching the back of his head with his hand. The other arm hung at his side, his thumb looped inside the edge of the towel, as if testing to see how much pressure was needed to cause the towel to fall yet again.

Now alert, Tifa felt herself go hot, and with the realization that all she was wearing was a white, threadbare guinea tee and pink panties, she tried to cover her chest by crossing her arms in front of her. Too late. Cloud's eyes rested on her breasts, and somehow she knew he had seen their rosy peaks harden beneath his gaze, as if beckoning him. Cloud cocked his head towards his left arm – and staring her in the eyes – gently grazed the tip of his thumb with his lips and teeth.

Tifa felt her entire body contract. "C-Cloud…" she stuttered, unsure of what to do. Without a word, he stalked into the room, closing the door soundly behind him. With a flourish, he threw the towel off, and Tifa stared at his naked body with a stunned gasp. Cloud loomed closer to her, slowly sat back on the opposite end of the bed, and leaned against the footboard with his delighted eyes dancing all over her body.

"… you like looking at my naked body, don't you? Why don't you show me what you'd like me to do with it?" He smirked. Speechless, Tifa's face went red and she sat there motionless. Cloud licked his bottom lip and kneeled in front of her. He pulled her up on her knees and closer to him, embracing her. He could feel her chest against him through her flimsy shirt, and hugged her tighter to him. As he did, his arousal pressed into her, and she cried out. "That's my girl…" he murmured into her ear, before nibbling on her lips. He slowly licked her bottom lip before pushing his tongue into her mouth, and gently caressing hers. The unexpected contrast of his soft, warm lips with his stiff nether region made her lose all control. She couldn't think. His kiss was all too perfect. She responded instinctively, ground herself against him, panting into his mouth. "That's my girl…" Cloud whispered again with a lilt of pleasure thickening his voice, "…Aeris."

Tifa snapped her eyes open, gasping for breath and in a cold sweat. 'Ah, ah ha ha ha! Just a dream.. of course!' she thought, shakily grasping her head at the roots of her hair. Ever since Cloud came home to stay, she'd been having dreams about him. This was the first blatantly sexual dream she'd had of him in a long time, but she had enough risqué dreams about him to make her scold herself just about every morning. There was the one where she'd come downstairs and Cloud was calmly doing dishes, _naked_; and another where he'd been polishing Fenrir, _naked_; and yet another where he'd been making her bed, _naked_. 'Why can't I stop thinking about naked Cloud! What has it been, only eight years of ungratified, unrequited romantic tension?' She thought, bitterly, pulling her hair harder. She couldn't help herself. Even though she knew Cloud and Aeris had been an intimate couple and her feelings of loyalty to Aeris were compromised, she still dreamed of Cloud in ways that would make even the biggest pervert blush.

"Uhm..Mom?" Denzel asked cautiously. He stood at the foot of her bed with Marlene, looking somewhat terrified. "OH! Denzel! Marlene!" Tifa said loudly. "What's the matter?" she smiled over enthusiastically. "Well, it's Saturday. You make us pancakes every Saturday… and… and when we heard you groaning, we thought you were sick or something.. so…" Denzel left off the obvious. They'd entered her room concerned for her while Tifa shamelessly fantasized in her sleep about Cloud's fantastic body ravishing her. …about Cloud's fantastic body ravishing her _spectacularly_.

Tifa turned a deep red and explained, "oh, no… No, not sick, just… uhm. Yes, well, I-you see – (can't think of an excuse!!)" Tifa finished the sentence in her head. "Ahem, that is, I'm up now, so I'll get right to it. Strawberry banana?" Tifa hurriedly pulled on a thick cotton robe from her closet and tied the knot tightly. "Strawberry banana!!" Denzel and Marlene shouted simultaneously. Relieved they were so easily distracted, Tifa hurried down the steps, followed closely by the two little kids.

Standing over the stove, her face hot from the griddle, Tifa smiled. Denzel and Marlene already held their forks and knives upright in their hands, chanting at the kitchen table, "Pancakes! Pancakes!" She loved her Saturday mornings. While cutting up the fresh fruit, her attention slowly drifting back to her thoughts.

'Only eight years…eight long years I've waited for him to catch up… to understand. I guess it's only three if I don't count that promise at the well, but… I can't help but count it because that's when I started falling in love with him. Three makes it sound less desperate though… and I guess you can't expect someone to get over their first love who was killed right in front of their eyes in three years, can you?' Tifa came perilously close to chopping off one of her fingertips along with the end of a strawberry. 'Dammit, dammit, dammit!' She berated herself, 'You desperate moron, can't you even function at the most basic level without daydreaming about Cloud!?' She didn't answer her own question because she knew that, lately at least, she could not. Her very sleep was interrupted with dreams of Cloud. It was impossible to do anything awake without thinking about him. Thus, after scolding herself soundly, she promptly slipped right back into her thoughts.

'I wonder if he'll remember kissing me when he wakes up this morning… but, I guess he thought I was Aeris so he'll probably think it was a dream.' She winced at the dull ache in her chest. ' I've never seen him look at me that way before…not even when we were in Costa del Sol… so he must've thought he was kissing Aeris. What a soft look, such soft lips… how could someone so strong be so tender? I'd almost forgotten just how that felt…' Tifa mused.

"Hey, Tif."  
"Morning." She turned around with an automatic smile at Cloud, who'd entered the kitchen soundlessly behind her as she flipped the pancakes over. There he stood, in the entrance of the kitchen. The pale, creamy flesh of his naked body covered only by his powder blue towel. The same chest and abdominal muscles that caught her breath while he was sleeping now spattered a surprised look across her face. Only now, in the morning sunshine, she could clearly see the deep scars both battle and nemesis had left on his flesh. The dark scars on his delicately pale skin filled her with memories, somehow both good and bad. Because somehow, Cloud had turned those horrible years of death and loss into victory; into newer, happier memories; and even into nostalgia for hard times no one could see the end of but that had finally been reached. She thought they were beautiful.

Wordlessly, Tifa looked him in the face, questioning. Marlene stopped chanting and giggling, said, "Cloud's naked!" He patted Marlene on the head with a heavy hand and a smile before nervously grinning at Tifa. He scratched the back of his blonde, spiky head with his left arm. The gesture, so very like Cloud and yet so very like the gesture he'd made in her dream, made Tifa flush. She quickly turned away to focus on her pancakes. Trying to figure out whether she was more irritated with her helpless attraction to him or with his oblivion to his own attractiveness, she said, "What's up?" Two words. All she could manage, and yet, they came out sounding a little angry even to her.

"Uh, heh, I can't find clean boxers. I was wondering if you did any in the wash?" He was a little uncertain, taken aback by the angry tone in her voice. Tifa sighed, "I don't know, Cloud. Why don't you check the laundry basket in my room?" A little too brief.

Cloud strolled over to her, "Er..I already did." He leaned in and Tifa tensed with surprise as he reached around her. With pilfered strawberry in hand, he looked her right in the eyes with a devilish grin and popped it into his mouth. His luscious mouth… Tifa gazed at his pink lips as they moved. Cloud stopped chewing, "Hey, is something the matter?"

She turned her face in the opposite direction, seeking for something—anything to busy herself with. She ignored the heat of his barely clothed body just behind her and grabbed for the spatula. "OW!" She cried out, burning her hand on the edge of the griddle. Cloud walked away and began rummaging in the fridge. Denzel stopped dueling butter knives with Marlene long enough to call out, "You ok, mom?" Tifa was too busy angrily thinking at Cloud to respond. 'Oh sure, your stupid mouth was the cause of all this…like venom or something! BUT FOR THE MIND. You asshole, you could at least feign concern,' She squeezed her burned hand.

"Here." Cloud suddenly turned around and before she knew what happened, he took her hand in both of his, holding ice on the burn. Startled, Tifa looked into his aqua eyes unguardedly. Locks of soft blond hair drooped in front of his face. His eyes piercingly gazed back at her. She caught her breath. Trying to think of something to say as he slowly massaged the ice onto her hand, he broke his stare. "You know, I must've hit my head on something last night. I slipped getting out of the shower and the next thing I knew, I woke up in bed with this bruise on my head." Cloud paused. It was a statement, but Tifa knew with Cloud, it was actually a question.

She looked at the bruise, half hidden behind locks of his hair, while answering, "Yeah… uh, I heard you and got you into bed, no problem." Confounded towel, she narrowed her eyes at it. Feeling a little awkward at their close proximity, he struggled to think of something else to say. A feat, being that he was so given to silence. "I had the craziest dream last night... I with Aeris and – well, and we were together, right? So I was about to kiss her when she turned into y—" he broke off quickly.

'What did you think you were going to say, idiot? You can't exactly tell her you had a dream about doing it with Aeris who turned into her. That's just weird, and probably offensive, and not exactly smooth, Cloud, not exactly smooth.' He stuttered out loud, and wondered why Tifa cast her eyes downward with a blush. 'Hm?'

"Oh! Sorry, heh-heh." Cloud hastily let go of Tifa's hand. He handed the ice to her. Taking it, Tifa didn't dare look up for fear he'd guess at her thoughts. Cloud turned away from her and crouched down to grab the spatula she'd flung to the floor. He looked at Denzel and Marlene questioningly as he stood up. What are they staring at?

_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH_! Cloud's mind screamed in panic. He snatched his towel off the kitchen floor with a mortified soul and a less than half-hearted laugh. _'Confounded towel!!_' Wrapping it tightly around his torso, Cloud clamped his fist down over top of it and wordlessly stalked around the corner and back up the stairs, burning with humiliation.

Tifa's eyes looked like two saucers, staring at his back as he walked away. 'Did I just see what I thought I saw?' She silently looked at Denzel and Marlene, who began laughing hysterically at the kitchen table. She pursed her lips, smiling and trying not to laugh as she walked over and slipped a few pancakes on their plates. Setting the strawberries and bananas next to a bowl of homemade whipped cream, she said, "Now, that's enough. Eat your pancakes and let's forget about the whole thing." _Ha!! _Tifa thought grinning. _What a fine booty!_ She suddenly glared, suppressing the urge to smack herself. _Confounded towel!!! _

"Hey, will mine ever get that big?" Denzel suddenly asked with a full mouth. Tifa floundered. "What do you mean?" she asked, uncertainly. His butt? She started, suddenly realizing that only she'd seen Cloud from his (glorious) behind. In between embarrassed giggles, she answered, "uh… I don't know Denzel. Why don't you ask Cloud?" She glanced at Marlene, who was still stifling laughter and groaned silently. Marlene already knew how boys and girls were different because when Marlene demanded to know why Denzel wasn't allowed to take baths with her, Tifa had to explain that he was too old for that kind of thing. Still, if Barret found out Cloud flashed his little girl, chaos was certain to ensue.

_Confounded Towel!!!_


	4. Chapter 3 Second Reason

Chapter 3 – Second Reason

_Author's Note: Hey guys! First, there's a reason this story is M rated, this chapter's one of those reasons why… After a review I got from __vx-Luna-xv (thanks LunA!) I realized that my couple pairings didn't really warn anyone about the somewhat extensive Clerith that takes place in this story. Hope it doesn't drive you nuts cuz it's kinda important to this story, so… Sorry! (;_;) Hopefully this chapter makes up for it (sorta?). To forewarn without giving anything away, there's lots of couple pairings I won't tell you about before hand…hope you can handle t! Anyway, please please __**please Review**__ whether you like it or not! I'm desperate, mmkay? Well, enjoy! _

**Disclaimer: Story's mine, nothing else. **

Safely locked away in his bedroom, Cloud grabbed a pair of black boxers off the floor, turned them inside out, and pulled them on. _Good as new_, he thought. Fighting off the urge to wallow in self-pity over his recent mortification, he stuffed his head into the bottom of a deep violet sleeveless sweater and tugged it on. It smelled woodsy, like Cedar and sandalwood.

_What the hell was that, anyway? Better yet, what the hell was with that dream? …Naked, and…Tifa… I buried that hatchet a long time ago._ Cloud was extremely pragmatic about these kinds of things, there was no sense in bringing up old feelings for him. It might take them a while to go away, but once they were done, they were done forever. As he zipped up his pants, he heard the phone ringing in his office, just across the hall.

"Strife Delivery Service." He kneeled with the phone in his ear and slid on thick leather boots. "Package to Desperado Inn, got it." He hung up. "Rocket Town it is," he said under his breath, grabbing a sword from his bedroom closet before heading to the stairs. The sound of laughter still rising from downstairs made him hesitate.

With that, he returned to his room, opened the window, and climbed out onto the roof. Walking to the edge, he calmly lowered his body with his arms and dropped the rest of the way down. Cloud gave a furtive glance at the bar windows while strolling over to Fenrir. She'll hear the bike start up and know I'm gone. She might worry. Without further contemplation, he kicked up the stand and rolled the bike around the corner.

Now resplendent in her black vest, shorts, and chucks, Tifa thought she could hear the roar of a motorcycle in the distance as she unpacked the boxes on top of the bar. She forced a smile even though she was alone and promised herself she wouldn't peek out the window, not once.

Roaring out of Edge, Cloud felt that feeling of freedom return to him. The open sky and meadows in front of him promised nothing less than liberty. No restrictions, no conditions, and definetly no towels. An easy smile spread across his face. The wind pushing against him – no matter how often he rode – always felt like flying. Minus the motion sickness. Cloud imagined that this same feeling was what Cid must feel when piloting the Highwind.

He had to stop at Fort Condor to pick up the package. An elderly gent was waiting for him at the entrance of the fort with one large package at his feet. He smiled wanly at Cloud, certain he wouldn't remember him from the Pheonix wars with Shinra a few years ago. "How've you been Xeno? It's been a while, ne?" Cloud stooped to lift the package and was surprised by how heavy it was. But since he knew Xeno was a good guy, he just shrugged it off and began strapping it to the back of Fenrir. Xeno answered, "Oh, it's been quiet out here without any battles to worry about. You've had a lot of excitement not too long ago, though." A gleam flickered in the old man's eyes as he asked, "How's that lady friend of yours?"

Cloud started, unsure of what to say. "She's… uh… She died a few years back." Xeno gave him an odd look. Cloud suddenly realized he couldn't be talking about Aeris because Xeno (like most of the people who'd encountered her at least once) was already aware of what happened to the flower girl.

"You meant Tifa, didn't you?" His guess was confirmed as the gleam in the old man's eyes returned. Only a woman like Tifa could get even an old foogey's blood stirring like that. Genetics gave her long slender legs, a perfectly rounded bottom, an hourglass waist, and a voluptuous pair of breasts all in one diminutive little package which stood at only 5'4. Her cheerful, friendly personality and laughing chestnut eyes were only an added bonus. She couldn't help it if she sent the testosterone of every man who saw her skyrocketing.

Cloud ran a hand through his spikes and turned back to the man. "She's doing well… she always does well, no matter what." He mounted his bike, waved, and roared off towards Junon to board a ship headed for Costa del Sol. But he found his mind turning itself back towards Tifa. She was easy on the eyes, to say the least. Even if she was his childhood friend, he couldn't help but notice and if it hadn't been for Aeris, he may have never gotten over his youthful crush on her. Sometimes, he felt like he was still in love with her… like when he'd dreamed of her writhing in the sheets, pinned beneath his body last night... His skin tingled at the memory.

That awful wave of emotion had been the most intense he'd ever felt in a dream, aside from his nightmares. He knew that there was no reason to hang onto Aeris' memory anymore. After Geostigma, he realized he'd not only been forgiven, but that Aeris was happy. She'd moved on, too. When she died, she found the man she was looking for, the man Cloud reminded her of. But even though their relationship had been one of refuge as they both sought another's love in each other's arms, it had also been the only real relationship he'd ever had. And he could not forget that.

Upon arriving at Junon, he rolled Fenrir onto the Grande laMer and stayed down in storage. He'd been told that when you were on the open sea, nothing beat the view from the forecastle deck, but as far as Cloud was concerned, nothing beat a nice long nap when the ship was shimmying along all that glistening, swirling, moving, water. So it was to his dismay that he couldn't fall asleep and his thoughts fervently went to and fro with every movement of the ship.

Oh, god. This is awful. I hate this part. How long til Costa del Sol? He glanced at his PHS and groaned at the realization that he'd only been at sea for 15 minutes. If he couldn't fall asleep, he had to distract himself. He deliberately turned his mind to thoughts that gave him peace and comfort, and that he could waste hours thinking about.

_Aeris loved Costa del Sol. The first time we went, she spent all day on the beach, wearing that sea green bikini that matched her eyes… Was it then that I realized she liked me? When she asked me to rub oil all over her? And Tifa_, he felt his irritation and jealousy mount without even realizing it, _Tifa spent all day with Johnny… talking about old times, as she put it. Every time I tried to talk to her, she acted like I was interrupting some kind of grand reunion._ Cloud recalled Johnny's goofy smile and felt like smashing his face in, _That punk. Who did he think he was to her, a long lost lover, or something? Come to think of it, the last time I was in Costa del Sol… was with Tifa, wasn't it? I had that package that was going to Nibelheim when I first started the delivery service two years ago… and I asked her to go with me because… because, I guess because I was scared to go alone. Scared of all those bad memories… and only she could understand that. Only she could know how I felt. I felt like I needed her, like my life depended on her being with me. Isn't that why I moved in with her to begin with? Because we were each the only family we still had. Without each other, we would've been completely rootless…lost. And then, then I kissed her._

Cloud remembered, it had been an overcast night, and you couldn't even see the stars. He thought they'd be alright once they crossed the sea to Costa del Sol, but it turned out the usually sunny city was in the midst of a tropical storm. If he had been alone he might have just decided to weather it through the storm, after all, he'd been riding Fenrir for so long that his bike was like an extension of his body. But with a passenger, he knew riding would be more difficult and dangerous, not to mention completely frightening for Tifa. They'd decided to stay at the villa that night and wait until morning, instead. It was before Barret had given Tifa charge of Marlene and before Cloud had found Denzel collapsed by Fenrir, so there was no reason to rush back.

_That night, that night…_ Cloud remembered it like it was yesterday. They'd taken turns showering, and he'd been lying on his back on the bed without a shirt on, thinking about old times. She came out of the bathroom, haloed in golden light. Her long, sable hair was damp and she wore nothing but a long t-shirt that she'd picked up from the souvenir shop around the corner. It had a silkscreen image of a sunrise on the beach and two silhouttes sitting on the sand beneath an umbrella and read, "Memories of a lifetime are made at Costa del Sol." He'd felt his stomach clench at the sight of her, her soft mounds of flesh evident beneath such flimsy fabric. Thunder rumbled threateningly outside, followed by a flash of lightning and the light in the bathroom instantly went off.

Tifa sighed, "I guess that's it for electricity, then." She strolled over in the darkness to the bed and lay down next to him. It was the only one because the villa was meant to be a lover's getaway, so they had to share. Since they'd often camped together in tents while journeying, she didn't see why sharing a bed was so much different. But still, she felt a little awkward inside as she slid beneath the sheets next to him. It just was different somehow. Maybe because they didn't have Yuffie loudly snoring nearby, or Barret stumbling around in the dark as he watched guard, or the gentle glow from Nanaki's tail lighting up the tent as he slept. Maybe it was because Aeris wasn't sleeping next to Cloud on the other side. Maybe it was because they weren't about to fight another battle at Junon, at Rocket Town, at the Northern Crater… Maybe it was because there was nothing romantic about sleeping in a tent with two other people after a long hard day fighting monsters and having no shower in sight. As Tifa was thinking about all of this, she began to self-conscientiously tug her shirt lower over her thighs. Without warning, he spoke.

"Tifa…you have always been there for me," he said, softly. Tifa opened one eye, and looked at him curiously. He was staring up at the ceiling, his arms folded beneath his head.

"Me?" she asked. "Yeah, you! I'm not talking in my sleep, you know," he looked over at her and smirked. She blushed because there was something sexy about the way he said it. Lightning flashed as he did, catching fire in the vibrant blue eyes which were trained on her.

He continued, feeling emboldened, "You were always the one rescuing me. It feels like one big act of god…you finding me at the train station that day, sick to my guts. Giving me a job with AVALANCHE, hooking me up with a place to stay… Hey, remember the night you came into my room at the Ghost Hotel at the Golden Saucer and said you couldn't sleep? And we spent all night out, acting in that crazy play and riding in the gonzola? You were trying to tell me something…something that was important, I think."

Tifa felt a thick lump form in her throat; it was a question. "I-I don't remember, actually." She answered, weakly. He stared into her eyes through the darkness as if searching her soul. A thick pause hung in the air, emphasizing her lie. He took a deep breath and continued, shifting closer to her, "then there was Mideel, and instead of escaping the lifestream eruption, you ran in after me… you saved me and you found me. I never even had the courage to thank you for it. I just went on as if it never happened…" He lowered his voice so she could barely hear him, "…Tifa."

She stared at him, amazed. She'd never expected him to speak of it again. Cloud rolled even closer, his head propped up with his left arm. Tifa could smell him, clean and woodsy. "And then there was the night before the Northern Crater…" and his hesitance told her this is what he had really been thinking about all along. A look Tifa couldn't quite place washed over Cloud's face, his eyes narrowed slightly and his brows furrowed with the memory. She could feel his breath tickle her face when he began speaking again. "When everyone disbanded and it was only us two, with no where to go, no place to call home and no one we had to see one last time but each other," he continued, "That night--" but his courage failed him. He couldn't bring up that night, just like she couldn't talk about the night they watched fireworks from the gonzola. It was too important. Too momentous. Too fragile… He couldn't talk about it, he thought, but he could show her what he meant.

With that, he pressed into her, hesitating when she stiffened at the contact of their two horizontal bodies, and then he leaned in. She smelled like vanilla and oranges and tasted just as sweet. It was soft, almost a nuzzle, and she didn't respond. His lips lingered on hers and just as he was about to pull away, he felt her mouth move beneath his. And suddenly, one soft kiss wasn't enough.

A fire ignited inside of him. He kissed her more fervently, wrapping her body up in his, and she kissed him back with equal passion. Their lips and tongues caught each other up in a frenzied but synchronized dance. Her velvet tongue stroking his, matching his. He was heavy and his weight pushed into her, making it harder for her to breathe. Her chest pushed deliciously against his with every intake of breath. They struggled to make the physical borders between their two bodies disappear, sinking into every inch of each other. His hands cupped her cheeks, his fingers swam through her hair. Cloud grabbed the base of her hair and squeezed the silky strands between his fingers. The gentle tug on her scalp made her feel as if his body owned hers, and nothing ever felt so right before. He slowly slid his right hand down her side, his left still entangled in her hair as he kissed her. Her soft, firm skin beneath the t-shirt beckoned to him. His hand found the end of her shirt, and slowly glided up her thigh, grasping her hip. She raised her hips towards him, responding to his subconscious need with her subconscious invitation. His hand tremblingly dragged up her side, and cupped her breast. She gasped in his mouth and squeezed him even closer. His fingers trailed lazily over the hard tips. A wave of heat broke over her. She bit his bottom lip, traced it slowly with her tongue as she panted. Cloud yanked the shirt from her body and momentarily forgot to breathe with the sight of her naked.

His teeth roughly grazed down her neck. She whimpered. He nipped her collarbone. She gasped. Dragging his tongue down her skin, he circled one of her soft mounds with his tongue and flicked across the hard tip before taking it between his lips and sucking. She panted, she dug her nails into his back, she squeezed her knees tightly against his sides. Her moans provoked him, made him want to make her scream. He slowly licked the hard tip of her breast and without warning, took it gingerly between his teeth. She yelped, "Cloud!" and ran her fingernails up his back, pressing herself into his hard length. He felt hot. And dizzy. And suddenly, when everything he clearly wanted was spread in an eager heap of passion in front of him, he got scared. He stared down at her, drinking in the look on her face – aroused and chest heaving, he did what felt like the hardest thing he'd ever done.

He rolled off of her and stood up, facing the window. "Maybe I'd better sleep on the couch." It was a statement. It was a rejection. Tifa felt crushed, and Cloud knew it by her silence. She didn't move, didn't speak, didn't exhale. He was ashamed of himself for doing it, but couldn't bring himself to look at her. He knew if he looked at her, it was over. He'd never be able to fight himself off of her for a second time and all it would take was one unhappy look to convince him he should stay.

"This was a mistake," he gruffly spoke, angry with himself for being unable to resist her but more angry with her for being so damn irresistible. "It won't happen again." Without turning his gaze from the dark window once, he stalked out of the room. That night was one of the most miserable of his life. Tossing and turning, unable to find a comfortable position all night was not his idea of a good time. On top of that, he suffered a severe case of blue balls that left the boys aching well into the morning.

When the sun finally rose, he dragged his heavy body from the couch and silently walked to the bedroom. Pushing open the door, he stared at the sleeping figure on the bed for any signs of movement. He cautiously stepped into the room until he was beside the bed. With a tilt of his head, he gazed down at her face. It was lit up in hues of red, orange and pink from the sunrise outside the huge window. He had felt, more than thought, that she was breathtaking. An invisible pull made him kneel beside her, smooth the hair away from her face with the tip of his finger, and brush her forehead with his lips. This woman loved him. …how did that make him feel?

Cloud took a deep breath and stood up. "Tifa," he shook her, "Tifa, wake up. Let's get an early move on so we can be back in Edge by nightfall." The last thing he wanted was another lay over in Costa del Sol. Tifa's eyes batted open, rubies glowing in the room, boring into his sapphire eyes. "Hey, Cloud…" she said softly. The words came out charged with tenderness and uncertainty. His name met his ears like a melody was seeping out of her mouth somewhere between the syllables. "Hey," he answered. His voice felt thick, and as he looked at her, he wondered if it sounded to her like hers sounded to him. For one silent moment, they watched each other's face, unmoving. Cloud broke the quiet, "Uh… let's go. Okay?" She inhaled and nodded. Cloud turned from her, and walking out of the room, finally took a breath. Everything was going to be okay.

The rest of that trip had been a little awkward. Tifa's body felt stiff and unflexible sitting on the bike behind him. Her hands felt too lightly pressed against him and around every turn, he worried she'd fall off if she didn't hang on a little tighter. They didn't talk, both wrapped up in their thoughts. During the one break they took to stretch their legs, their eyes had met for an unsettling moment. After that, he'd rode hard the rest of the way, not stopping once until they reached home. When they finally arrived, Tifa scrambled off the bike before him somehow and gave a hearty laugh, her eyes squeezed shut, at Cloud's look of surprise. "I'll go in and fix dinner. Why don't you tune up your bike and I'll call you when it's ready?" She was so much back to normal, that Cloud felt his whole body relax. He smiled at her and nodded. She ran inside, humming.

And that was it. Cloud realized he was biting his lip and relaxed his face into its usual brooding frown. He checked the time and discovered he had only a couple more minutes until they reached Costa del Sol. With that, he stood and began to undo the cords he'd used to securely strap up Fenrir. Just as he undid the last one and put them all away in his leather riding bag, the conductor called out from above. Time to unboard.

The bright sun greeted him outside, harsh on his eyes after daydreaming in the cargo hold for hours. He threw his right leg over the bike and roared off through the sandy streets of the tropical city.


	5. Chapter 4 Third Reason

Chapter 4- Third Reason

_Author's Note: Hello, hello! Thanks to those who've reviewed so far, I'm really enjoying all your input and hope I can either continue to satisfy your Cloti needs or do better than I have thus far. If you haven't yet (or heck, even if you have, and just want to say something more) please Review! _

**Disclaimer: The woes of having no ownership whatsoever of the wonderful world of FFVII belongs to me (and most likely, to you, too). **

As Cloud rode through the mountain pass towards Gongaga, he batted back monsters as if they were nuisances. Nothing, compared to the foes he'd seen. His body was on autopilot, his mind was elsewhere.

Even when he made the decision between which woman he'd pursue, he was conscious of why he'd chosen Aeris. She was beautiful and girly in a way that made him feel needed, but he'd always known that he'd exchanged Tifa for reasons beyond that. The truth was, Aeris wasn't a risk. Everything was simpler, safer, direct. With Tifa, he would've been risking everything on one turn of the dice. There had been no question in his mind that he desired her in a way he did not desire Aeris. Yet somehow, choosing Aeris seemed like the right thing to do for himself. There were no worries, no emotional baggage, no fuddled up past. She – refreshingly – knew nothing about him and he knew nothing about her.

There was always just too much hanging thick in the air between him and Tifa. Even now.

Cloud stomped a booted foot hard on the ground and came to a screeching halt. Fenrir idled beneath him as he wiped the back of his arm against his forehead. He was approaching Gongaga. The humid atmosphere clung to his skin and clothes. The Nibel Mountains loomed, sharp and grey in the distance, as he took a swig from a bottle of water. His throat moved spasmodically with every gulp.

He'd felt bad, of course, for misleading Tifa in Costa del Sol. He thought he'd finally be able to put the past behind him. There was no reason to fear Sephiroth, Aeris was gone, and he finally knew the truth about himself. He'd reached for her because he thought he was ready to live a life that wasn't a lie. But when she'd called his name, she'd awoken him from a deep, hazy sleep. There were suddenly so many emotions coursing through him at once… things so unexpected, he'd felt as if he'd never really lived before. There was guilt, shame, animalistic lust and hunger, but above all, there was fear and a queer, painful throbbing in his chest. Without really understanding why or how, Cloud was sure he would entirely consume her or be destroyed by her.

"Christ," he murmured. "She should've given up then." _Even if it is my fault she hasn't…_he added silently. _My actions in the villa gave her reason to believe I could find my way back to her again. But after that, I was more certain than ever that I'd never be able to love Tifa like she needed. She seems to be moving on, for the most part. I knew she would, and I'm glad, otherwise I'd have to leave her and the kids again. She'd hate me, eventually. _

Feeling his anger subside, Cloud dropped his long gaze from the mountains, lifted his foot from the ground, and yanked the throttle back. He'd be in Rocket Town in time for sunset if he pushed it.


	6. Chapter 5 Cid's Excuse

Chapter 5 – Cid's excuse

_A/N: This chapter is to make up for the last, rather uneventful one, but does contain one of those couplings that I sincerely hope doesn't piss you off… though it probably will. Sorry, sorry! I have a plot that needs unfolding! Don't beat me! \(~_~;)/ _

**Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to FFVII, just to the plot of this story. I also do not own the rights to the particular song that appears below.**

"What the fuck you want?" Cid glared out at him from the crack in the doorway. He was unshaven and tired looking, purple puffs of sleepiness looming beneath his blue eyes. "To say hi, you shit." Cloud answered, pushing his way into the house. "I delivered a package this morning to the inn and figured I'd stop by to see you and Shera. What's a matter with you?"

Cid looked away and gruffly replied, "Won't find Shera here, she's off wit her boy-toy. Now get out." Cloud's eyes snapped open in surprise. "Boy-toy?? But aren't you and Shera – " Cid cut him off, "Well, obviously not, spike!" The anger in his voice couldn't completely mask the pain in it.

"W-well who – " Cid snapped before he could complete the question. "That dumb-ass Turk, the one who's always mopey and silent, like a damn mime, he is."

"You mean Rude?" Cloud asked incredulously. "Yea… that's the one." Cid mumbled. Cloud almost laughed but for Cid's obvious pain. Rude and Cid could practically be the same person if it weren't for Cid's loud-mouthed nature. Both had the older, tough-guy exterior, one was the loud menacing type and the other, the silent menacing type. Still, how Shera had managed to get close to a guy who almost never said anything was a mystery. Thankfully, he didn't have to probe.

"After Kadaj and those guys started all that trouble, I guess Shera got to feelin' like the Turks weren't all bad. So when he came into Rocket Town to pick up an order Rufus made, I guess they got to talkin. You know that woman could make a dead fish talk, she jes never shuts up. S'all that tea, I'm telling ya."

"Wow, Cid… I'm sorry—"

"Sorry? Sorry for what? That woman was a giant hemorrhoid if yer askin' me. Glad to be rid of her. S'bout time, I'm tellin' you that." Cid's angry pride did nothing for him but serve to increase Cloud's sympathy.

Seeing a look on his face that Cid did not quite like, he motioned for Cloud to sit down. "While yer here, might as well hava drink. I'm celebratin'." He poured himself a shot of deep amber liquid, filled up a second glass for Cloud, and lifted his drink in the air. "To freedom!" He swigged the liquid back, Cloud hesitantly following his lead. It burned his throat and nestled with an unsettling feeling into the pit of his stomach. What the hell was this stuff?

"Now that's good stuff, 'init?" As Cid swung back another one, Cloud mulled over how to talk seriously about Shera without offending him. Luckily, he didn't have to think too long since it appeared the liquor was beginning to make Cid loose lipped. "That damn woman… never understood nothing. Why couldn't she jest stop being so damn nice at me all the time and let me be? Yanno, Cloud… 'ts a funny thing, but... Aint it true? ".

At Cloud's puzzled gaze, Cid started singing completely out of tune, tone-deaf and drunk, "When I wus young, never needed anyone… makin love wus jus fer fun… those days er gone.." He raised his voice into the ear splitting shriek of a cat being tortured on the rack, "ALL BY MYSELF, DON'T WANNA BE, ALL BY MYSEEEELLFFF AAANNYYYYMOOOOOOOORE!!!"

A few hours later, Cloud exited Cid's shop, satisified that the drunken pilot had passed out at least until next day's noon. The empty black sky did nothing to comfort him from his thoughts as he mounted Fenrir and started it up. He took one last look back at Cid's with a mixed expression of sorrow and concern on his face, but set off, more eager than usual to get back to his own home.

**As always, please review!**


	7. Chapter 6 Engaged!

Chapter 6 – Engaged!!

**Disclaimer: Please…can't I… pretend…to own a piece of FFVII??**

_A/N: Sorry for the wait, guys! Thanks to everyone who reviewed, including __**FairheartStrife, scienceguy, AsianScaper, POOnCHOCO, Sidney Blackwell, CLOUDxTIFAforever, Mizame, cloudlover2989, and Kattzia.**__ Hope you enjoy the new chapters!_

When Cloud finally reached home a little after midnight, only a few of the lights were on in the bar. Tifa usually closed a little earlier on weekdays so that the house would be quiet and the kids could sleep in peace, but Saturdays were always prime time for the business. Yet when he came through the front door, his boots heavy and loud against the wooden floor, he was surprised to see no one but Tifa and Yuffie sitting at the bar, having a drink.

Both girls turned their heads at his entrance, smiled and waved, then promptly ignored him. But he could just make out Yuffie's sing song whisper, "Your beau is home, do you want me to leave so you can give him a proper welcome?"

Tifa turned a pretty shade of pink, and glared, replying through gritted teeth, "how kind of you, but I don't need any privacy for that." Yuffie grinned, "Oh, well, thanks for the invite but that's not really my thing." Tifa couldn't help but laugh, even as she swiftly lifted one side of Yuffie's stool up with her foot, causing both Yuffie and her stool to crash to the floor. "Oh, Yuffie, you really are too much. Can't you ever say when you've had enough!?" Tifa said in a loud pretentious voice, for Cloud's benefit.

Yuffie growled at her from the floor as she rubbed her arse, "Well at least I know when to say I haven't had enough, how long has it been now!? Thr-" Tifa jumped up from her stool and hurried over to Cloud to greet him, "Cloud! How's it been? Are you hungry? Packages finally done for the day?" Cloud nodded, a blank look on his face. Was Yuffie about to reference something alarmingly private?

"Why are you here?" Cloud asked, in a not completely friendly tone, as he took of his jacket and began removing his armor. Yuffie squealed with delight. "Oooh, goodie! I get to tell the good news again! I was afraid you might already know, Cloudie-poo. Being the well-traveled stoic that you are. Tifa closed the bar early tonight because she had to hear about every detail once I told her that me and Vince are getting married!!"

Cloud's whole body went rigid, and he slowly turned his head, giving Yuffie a dubious look. She burst out laughing, "Haha! You see! Not everyone thinks this hot piece of ass isn't worth all the practical jokes and missing materia! In fact, I think Vinnie might even like it.. he always punishes me when he finds out I've done something naughty." Yuffie winked suggestively while Cloud blanched. Tifa mercifully intercepted. "Say Congratulations, Cloud!"

His head swimming, Cloud sat down at a small table, taking his time pulling off his gloves and unwinding the wrappings beneath. Finally, unable to sort out whether this was a joke or not, he mumbled, "Congratulations, Yuffie." Yuffie howled with glee, rushed to Cloud's side and threw her arms dramatically around him, deafening his ears with, "I KNEW you'd be happy for us! Barret kept saying I was too young and Vince was too old, blahblahblah blah. But I knew there was hope for you, yet. I knew you'd understand that love, if left unfulfilled, just goes sour and bitter…" Yuffie's words faded in his mind as he thought about Cid and Shera.

Yes, perhaps that was true. Perhaps love, when left alone, really did just turn sour. He snapped back to attention, and looked towards Tifa with a plea in his eyes to just shut this ninja up. But he was surprised to see that the brunette stunner was slowly wiping down the bar with a rag, a melancholy aspect to her dark eyes as Yuffie gabbered on.

His heart surged. He walked steadily towards her, pausing as she continued what she was doing, lost in her own thoughts. And then he folded her in his arms, pressing her back to his chest in an embrace he'd never felt right giving before. His lips brushed the top of her head, inhaling her fragrant scent. And he held her. Tifa stood, wide eyed. Yuffie, stunned, stared with her mouth hanging open, swallowing for eternity the sentence she had been in the middle of.

Cloud squeezed her a little tighter, knowing it would be a long time again before he could bring himself to hold her. Then he murmured against her hair, "I'm going to bed," and let her go, slowly shuffling up the stairs.

A moment later he was briefly stirred from sleep as he heard Yuffie leaving. She was saying something but he couldn't make out the words. But finally, the door shut, an engine started, and footsteps could be heard on the stairs. He drifted peacefully off to sleep.


	8. Chapter 7 Torment, Bribery, Jealousy

Chapter 7 – Torment, Bribery, Jealousy

_A/N: New chappie is a little longer and a little sooner, since I made you guys wait so long and I Loooooovvveee yyyyoouu!! Won't you love me too and review?_

**Disclaimer: I'm just a fantacial FFVII fan, hoping for more of that wonderful Cloti romance. That's it.**

"Zip me up?"

Cloud stared at the vision before him – an angel warrior in black lace. She pulled her silky dark hair into knots between her fingers, gossamer strands slipping from her hands. A sleek line of golden skin peeked out beneath the open back of her dress. His tormentor.

"Uh… Sure." He stood from his bed, the book in his lap falling to the floor with a quiet thud on the carpet. The clasp of the red bra she wore was not hard to miss. His fingers trembled a little on the zipper, tickling her lower back with the gentlest of caresses. The suppleness of her skin momentarily shocked him with longing to kiss her there. He knew just how she would taste, succulent and sweet.

With one smooth motion the deed was done – the dress zipped up, Tifa's soft skin safely hidden away. She turned to him, letting her hair fall from her shoulders; her smile glittered in her chocolate cherry eyes.

He took a deep breath at the sight of her. And then instantly, he frowned. Her smile vanished, she pouted. "What's wrong? Don't you like my dress for Yuffie's engagement party?"

"No." He glided past her as he said it – intently focused on the empty glass jar on top of his dresser.

"But, Yuffie and Marlene helped me pick it out! They both said it was perfect for me!" She looked down at the dress on her body, feeling very silly in it all of a sudden. She glanced at herself in Cloud's mirror, turned and examined herself from behind, and turned again. As she fretted, Cloud watched. He watched the way the lace clung to her derriere as she moved, the way the narrow skirt forced her to walk with an exaggerated sway to her hips. He watched the way the scalloped neckline and the bits of lace reaching just past it called his attention to her bare shoulders, her throat, her collarbone, her breasts. Her long, lean legs were revealed to just above the knee – but he was sure that when she sat, her thighs would peep out from the hem, beckoning a man to lay his hand upon them. But what he hated most about the garment was the way the nude slip beneath it made her seem more naked than dressed.

Tifa fiddled with the black satin sash at her waist, tying the bow to the side. "Does it look better if the bow is on the side instead of in the front?" Cloud raised his eyes from her behind to meet her gaze in the mirror. He felt his face go a little hot, crossed his arms, and stubbornly turned his head away. "No one's going to notice that bow no matter where you put it." Tifa scowled. _Ok, so he hates the dress. Fine. He could try to be sympathetic to a girl's feelings though._

She started to tell him so but the scolding stuck in her throat when she realized that he was, however indirectly, giving her a compliment. To test this doubtful theory, she strutted across the room, turned, and walked back – all the while following Cloud's gaze in the mirror. His eyes alighted with precision on all of the places a tempted man, savoring the sight of a beautiful woman, would. "It's no good. We have to find you another dress," Cloud said flatly, his soft, thoughtful expression still trained on her ass.

"Why? Even if you don't like it, I do." Tifa turned, a grin spread across her pretty face. He felt an odd sensation of anger creep into is stomach. "You can't wear that." Tifa made her way, one sashaying step at a time, over to Cloud. He leaned against his dresser, hands stuffed inside his pockets. She titled her head slightly and looked up at him. "Don't glower – it's too late now. I told you that you should come dress shopping with us." Cloud scoffed, a look of disdain in his frown. "Why didn't you ask Reno to go dress shopping?"

"R-reno? What's he got to do with all this? Besides, I think he'll like this dress." Cloud felt the anger rise up into his chest. "Yea – ha." He couldn't think of anything else to say without making himself sound ridiculous even to his own ears. "You don't think he'll like it? Well, let's find out. I'll call him up right now!" Tifa grabbed the phone from Cloud's dresser.

He felt the anger lodge in his throat like a thick piece of half-chewed meat. "No, don't." The command sounded much deeper than usual, forced through the lump obstructing his throat. He swallowed. It was no good. "Why are you even _going_ with that guy?" He couldn't keep it down. It was just coming out of his mouth now, of its own volition. "I mean, he's a Turk – you know, anti-AVALANCHE assassins? And _bad_ ones, at that," Cloud muttered. He knew he sounded like a crazed boyfriend but the anger was just seeping out through his teeth somehow. He didn't even know why he felt like this.

"Cloud, please. You know they helped us fight Kadaj; they're not our enemies anymore. Otherwise, why would Shera think it'd be a good idea to set us up? She trusts Rude, and he trusts Reno. So he can't be all bad…" She put the phone down and puffed a stray piece of hair out of her face. _Shera, that bi – Cid, control your damn woman! _Cloud's jaw tightened. _Well… not really Cid's anymore, I guess,_ he thought sadly.

"Why do you need a date to this thing? Couldn't you just go by yourself?"

"No, Cloud! I need an escort just like everyone else! And since you refused to come and Barret is going with Elmyra, and Cid's never sober anymore, what was I supposed to do? And don't even say take Denzel, because as sweet as it was for him to offer, you know that would've looked silly. Besides, he's Marlene's date for the night. And you wouldn't want Marlene dancing with some stranger, would you?"

Cloud's mouth snapped shut but the resentment was still visible on his pale face – manifesting itself in a hard, square jaw and steely blue eyes narrowed in a glare. _Don't pout like that. Is this…is he jealous? Why don't you just agree to come then, dummy!_ Tifa thought, resting her gaze on his mouth. She peered sincerely up at him. "Look, I know you're worried about me. But I'll be alright. What could possibly happen to me or Denz & Marlene while we're surrounded by all of our friends? Even Nanaki's going, so…" Tifa hesitated. In fact, Cloud was the only one not going. Even Cid, who had been having the hardest time celebrating love as of late, insisted on going, and Barret, too. He was utterly against Vincent and Yuffie's relationship but eventually caved and decided to support his friends. _Why won't you? It's not like your really against Vincent and Yuffie being together, are you?_ She silently wondered. _Maybe Cloud secretly has a desire for former AVALANCHE members to remain just as they were – just comrades. After all, he and Aeris were more than just partners fighting to save the world, and look what happened to them,_ Tifa silently reasoned.

"Cloud… Why aren't you going? Don't you care that Yuffie and Vincent are happy together?" Her voice raised a notch too high and cracked under the weight of her question. "…it's…not that," he gently replied. "Well – what is it?"

"I just… it'd be different, you know, if it were just all of us. But it's not… cuz of Shera, that ninja invited all of those Turks plus even some people from Shinra. I don't think I can be happy celebrating under the same roof as some of those people," he muttered tensely. Who was it in particular that he wanted to avoid, Tifa wondered. Rufus? That didn't seem to make much sense. He may have been responsible for a lot of AVALANCHE's former troubles, but now – wasn't everything different? Wasn't Rufus trying to rebuild the new world and make it as independent from mako use as them? _It's not like Yuffie invited Sephiroth or something_, she thought grimly. Though that was something she could almost imagine the girl doing in her current state of to-be-wedded bliss. She'd invited everyone she knew. Naturally, it was to be a huge, extravagant event worthy of a Wutai princess in love. As her best friend, Tifa couldn't refrain from going just because Cloud didn't want to accompany her. Besides, she rarely got to see the whole crew at once anymore.

Deep down Cloud knew he was being a coward. There was nothing to fear; nothing but the unveiling of a secret he'd buried long ago. If it meant a choice between disappointing Tifa by not going to the party or disgusting her when she found out – well – his preference sided with cowardice. Still, he wasn't certain if Tifa's desperation for a date was suitable enough a reason to go with that perverted scumbag Reno, full of his smug suaveness and his retarded come-ons that actually worked for some reason. Anyone would've been better, even Johnny.

Cloud frowned but all other traces of his frustration vanished from his face. He was genuinely unhappy. What should he do? "Tifa…" he beckoned. It was almost a sigh and she didn't hear him. The temptress had walked back across the room to grab her list of things to do before leaving via the Highwind tomorrow. He stared at her forlornly as she scanned the list. She'd be gone from his side, gone from his sight, for an entire weekend.

Without warning, Marlene dashed into Cloud's room. Cloud blinked. "Ran..all… theway… here…from (huff) school!" As the tiny girl caught her breath, Cloud waited. Her hair covered her face, her body bent forward with her hands rested on her knees as she sucked in as much air in at once as she could. For a moment he was afraid she might be hyperventilating but finally, she snapped her little frame upright, beamed at him, and said excitedly, "Do you like the dress!?"

He smirked and nodded just once so Tifa wouldn't notice. Then he pressed one finger to his lips in a gesture of secrecy. Marlene smiled brilliantly at him. "Well, are you coming then??" Cloud's face fell a little. Didn't she know the meaning of subtlety? "Uh.. I mean, I guess that means that you're not coming, huh?" Her depressed tone was pathetically over the top. _Well, you'd never be able to accuse Marlene of being an actress,_ he grinned. "Bummer…" she added for effect. Cloud let out a chuckle and Tifa raised an eyebrow at them from across the room.

"I don't know, Marley. Not really my thing, you know?" Her face fell. Eerily, the disappointed expression turned to an evil gleam in the girl's eyes. "Oh well. That's for the best anyway. Daddy says he's gonna kill you when he sees you for walking around the house naked, anyway." She shrugged and walked abruptly from the room, leaving Cloud a little flabbergasted. What was this, bribery? Or had she really told Barret that she'd seen Cloud naked? _Confounded towel!_ His face burned.

Before he had too long to think about it, Tifa sighed and announced that she'd go talk to her. "Sorry, Cloud. You know she loves you. She is just incredibly excited about this, you know?" Great. More guilt. More bribery, too. He wasn't sure which pissed him off more, Tifa's escort or Marlene's display of affection. At Cloud's peevish non-reply, Tifa chewed her bottom lip and walked sexily out – leaving him to brood about both the women in his life.

**Review, review! It keeps me encouraged! **


	9. Chapter 8 Fourth Reason

Chapter 8 – Fourth Reason

_A/N: Hey guys. Sorry this took so long, I didn't forget about you but my computer was on the fritz and it had to be taken care of. I just got it back a few days ago and have worked tirelessly to try to give you the chapter you all deserve for waiting so patiently. So please don't beat me!! (cowering) Anyway, this chapter is very long, contains my first "real" lemon, and I hope the progression is not too confusing as I tried to mix up the storytelling a bit. I did take some liberties with the layout and technology of the Highwind as you may or may not notice or care. Thanks to all who reviewed last time, __**Phoebz, CrazyKidDeath, Mizame**__ (ha, you got your lemon, chika) __**CLOUDxTIFAforever, POOnCHOCO, **__and __**cloudlover2989 **__(I'd love it if you drew tifa's dress, send me a scan of it when you're done!) Hope it was worth the wait, and sorry again!! _

**Disclaimer: Still don't own anything.**

"Cloud? Cloud, wake up!" Someone knocked at the door. "Wha-?" Why were his pants wet? _Oh yea… lavender nightie, was it?_

"Cloud." He threw his blankets over his lap as Tifa came into the room and turned over to hide the issue. "Tifa, it's…early." His voice came out muffled through his pillow. "Yea, but I have lots to do today, and I'm recruiting your help. We have to close up the bar, finish packing, buy any last minute supplies…"

Cloud slowly opened his eyes halfway. "Huh?" He could see Tifa out of the corner of his eyes, arms crossed in front of her chest, impatiently tapping her foot. "Ugh, Cloud!? Did you forget!?" Her voice kept going, but his mind wandered, tuning her out. She was dressed in a pink t-shirt that looked like it might be a tad small, and a jean miniskirt that showed off the lean length of her legs. _Lavender nightie…_

"Cloud!! Are you paying attention!?" Tifa stamped. "Yuffie's engagement party, remember! We have to leave for Wutai tonight, you moron! Now get up." Something somewhat heavy hit him in the head. He kept his eyes closed, muttering beneath his breath. He could hear her walking nearer; feel the deadly glare she had fixed on the back of his head. _1…2…3! _Cloud quickly propped himself up and grabbed her hand, mid-air. He pulled Tifa in, his hand secure around her wrist, her blush enticing him. He pulled her so close that he could kiss her if he wanted to. But instead, he peered at her through sultry half open eyes and said flatly, "I'm up," before letting go of her wrist, a sexy smirk spreading over his lips.

Tifa realized she'd been had, and narrowing her eyes_,_ she turned towards the door, very conscious of his eyes lingering on her. Her to do list slipped from her hands, and she slowly, slowly bent down to pick it up. Cloud's eyes instantly widened, catching an alluring glimpse of her frilly powder blue underwear. She cheekily pranced out of his room, laughing to herself. _Haha, that'll give him something to smirk about!_ She heard Cloud scramble out of his bed and turn on the shower. _Probably cold,_ she thought triumphantly.

After all, Tifa was no idiot. Once Cloud began living with her, she quickly realized his desire for her. How could she not know it after he had almost claimed her in Costa del Sol? And just as she was aware of his attraction for her, she felt he must be aware of hers for him… how he could set her heart pounding just by staring at her a bit too hard, or by putting his face a few inches too close to hers… The issue was never a lack of desire.

Rather, if the issue that kept them separated had to be named, she'd say it was love. Tifa strongly suspected that it would be a betrayal on their part to forget the love they'd shared with Aeris; he as her lover and she as her friend. But she instinctually knew that it was not only for the pink-clad flower girl that they did not delve into the shadowy realms of romance together. As much as she wanted his body to become more familiar with hers, and as much as she suspected his body wanted that as well, they both loved each other too much to jeopardize the deep and sincere bond they had. As for what Cloud would say, she didn't know. But not knowing made it easier for her to assume he felt the same way, and she would go on thinking that since it was the only thing that kept her satisfied with the current state of their bizarre _non-_relationship. However, every now and then, when Cloud's eyes lingered on her for agonizingly long moments, almost feline in their intensity, she knew that this was not the reason for his distance. And that always broke her heart a little bit more.

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A half hour later, Cloud made his way down to the kitchen hoping for breakfast, a very large cup of coffee, and the sight of the three smiling faces he loved best. It was a couple weeks ago that Yuffie had broke the news of her dubious engagement, but all the same, the party had completely slipped his mind. This was probably on purpose, he was sure his consciousness was trying to protect his sanity. The reveal of Tifa's dress had shattered that delicately maintained ignorance last night, unfortunately, and now all of his waking thoughts were occupied with that stupid, red-haired egomaniac who dared to make advances on _his_ childhood friend. His sleeping ones; however, apparently consisted of Tifa, scantily clad… in very un-childlike situations.

He swiped an apple from the basket on the counter. "Where's Denzel and Marlene?" He glanced at the apple before biting into it, silently wondering where his breakfast was, also. "I had them run to the market for me to buy some last minute things. And by the way, you missed breakfast," Tifa remarked, kneeling on the floor as she carefully repacked Denzel and Marlene's suitcases. Cloud smiled to himself. She had let them pack their own bags so that she didn't stifle their enthusiasm for the trip. But she was a mom, biological or not, and she wanted their clothing to remain wrinkle free throughout the weekend. "There's some cereal in the pantry, though. After you eat, would you mind closing the bar for me? There's a checklist on the counter," Tifa continued, folding.

Footsteps clambered all over the front porch. "I won, I won!!" Denzel hollered, scrambling into the kitchen and tackling Cloud, steps in front of Marlene. "No fair, you said the front door was the finish line, you can't switch it to Cloud, now!" She sulked, dropping her bags to the floor to cross her arms. "No, you know the finish line is always Cloud when he's up, so, it's your fault for not seeing him," he gleefully said. Marlene tackled Cloud anyway, her exhilaration getting the better of her. "So you decided to come!?" Denzel nudged Cloud's side secretively. "Uh…." Cloud reached for words that were not misleading. Denzel interrupted, saving him from an unpleasant fate. "Marley, I told you! He's coming with us to Wutai because he's not sure yet. Now stop bothering him and let him think about it." Marlene pulled down her eyelid and stuck out her tongue at him.

"Tifa! Is Cloud coming, after all?" She glided over to the brunette, still occupied with folding the last of the laundry Marlene had stuffed into her bag. "Hey, why are you packing my clothes? I did it last night…" Tifa hurriedly folded the last bit and zipped up the bag. "Heh heh, just making sure you didn't forget anything." It wasn't exactly a lie. That was part of what she'd been doing.

Denzel poked Cloud's side, drawing his attention away from Tifa and the bright six year old. "Don't worry about Marlene. When she heard you were going on the trip with us to deliver a package to Wutai, she jumped to conclusions. So I told her you were coming just in case you decided to change your mind," he whispered. Cloud nodded, appreciatively. At Denzel's worried look, he rested his heavy hand on the boy's shoulder. "It's just… I guess I wish you were coming, too, Cloud. I don't like it; that Reno's going to be Tifa's date. I don't trust that guy." Cloud smiled, "Yea, but I trust you, Denz. I'm leaving our girls in your hands, this weekend. Think you can handle it?" Denzel's face filled with wonder and embarrassment as he looked up at his golden haloed hero. Cloud trusted him to protect Tifa and Marlene all by himself? A firm look of resolve washed over Denzel's face. "I won't let you down," he said earnestly.

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Dusk was painting shades of bruise across the horizon by the time the Highwind had landed on the outskirts of Edge, awaiting the approach of three Lockharts and one Strife. The reunion with Cid was one of both joy and sadness. He swung Denzel and Marlene around in circles in response to their cries of delight and their eager hugs for him. Cloud was astonished at how happy the pilot had become just because the kids had affectionately dubbed him Uncle Cid. It reminded him, painfully, of the kind of life the older man should have had. They all climbed aboard and quickly sorted out sleeping quarters for the duration of their overnight flight. Then the Highwind slept.

Cloud awoke with a gasp. His heart pounded out an erratic rhythm on his ribcage. He lay twisted in his sheets, glaring at the ceiling in the dark. His anger was steadily increasing as he kept still. Finally, stifling an enraged scream from ripping out of his chest, he jumped out of bed and dropped immediately to the floor. His bare chest and back protested to the cold air by pricking goose bumps across his flesh. He breathed out and pushed himself off the floor, breathed in and sunk to the ground again.

Push ups. They usually helped. He just needed to get some energy out.

After fifty more, he decided that it was not helping. His muscles felt tight and wound up. His throat was raw from that rebellious scream still lurching around, trying to claw its way out. He needed release. He needed it now.

He shoved the floor from his body, and stood in one swift movement. He snatched a bundle of cloth from his nightstand and forced himself to walk calmly from the room as he focused on wrapping his fists. Cloud's bare feet tread noiselessly on the plush scarlet carpet and dressed only in the black sweatpants he'd slipped on before falling asleep, he made his way to the deck of the airship. He flicked a switch and pulled a heavy punching bag from the closet, lifting it onto its chains as a glass enclosure hydraulically rose into place. Only then did he allow instinct and wrath to rule him. His fists shot out in the dark, one after another, after another; endlessly seeking to destroy the hate welling up inside of him. And yet as he bombarded the bag with right hooks and left jabs, Cloud felt as if his lethal blows were only the rain, pattering on the glass. This feeble helplessness increased his fury until it threatened to suffocate him. He was gasping, his sides burning; sweat dripping into his eye, every muscle and vein in his body taunt and full of blood, when he noticed her.

"Cloud…?" She called to him softly, wrapping her arms around her shivering body. Cloud shut his eyes tightly, leaning one arm against the bag before turning towards her. Sweat trickled down the crevice between his pecs and over the grooves of his abs before settling into that thin line of hair denoting the forbidden regions below. Her chestnut hair hung loosely around her frame as it shivered, the flowery summer nightgown she wore leaving most of the body beneath it vulnerable to his imagination. Her eyes were wide with concern and fright as they met the fierce gaze of his stunningly vibrant eyes. _Damn that woman. Damn the way she says my name. Damn that infuriating way she stares at me. Damn it! _ She stood impossibly still as Cloud stalked angrily towards her, convinced from the look on his face and the speed with which he moved that he was going to strike her.

He grabbed her roughly by the arms, his momentum shoving her body up against the wall, hard. She lost her breath. He pinned her body against his, every muscle in it digging into her flesh. His scowling face was inches from hers, his jaw clenching and unclenching. For one unbearable moment, everything was still. Then all thoughts of self-defense flew from her mind when he suddenly crashed his lips against hers. The kiss was fire, consuming her. A drowning sensation. Was she flying? She was losing herself in him.

_He gathered her in his arms, tenderly kissing her lips, her ears, her neck. Every sensation was new to her, and every lick, kiss, or bite sent shockwaves throughout her body. He looked into her eyes, his gaze heavy with lust. She'd had an alluringly innocent gaze of hope and fear fixed in those deep Bordeaux hued orbs. He grappled with an intense urge to make her scream out his name in pleasure right then. He __**would**__ go slow with her. He had to. It would be the only time he'd ever get to cherish her like this. _

"_Tifa…" his brilliant sea bred eyes looked at her with an expression she'd never seen before. They seemed to pierce right through her clothing, as if running their soft gaze up and down her bare body. Her flesh shivered all over. "Tell me you want me…" he said, softly. He leaned in, watching her as his perfect kiss made her mind swirl, his soft lips catching onto hers, his tongue sweeping over hers… caressing. She opened her eyes again to see those glowing aqua eyes so close, so intently staring, waiting for her answer. _

'_I have always wanted you…' her heart pounded it out… but her breath could not carry the words out of her throat. And though she was not aware of it, her eyes said it all; her love for him shining through like a lighthouse in the night, beckoning the ships at sea to come home. _

_Cloud lowered his mouth to her neck, softly kissing, then tasting, then sucking her skin. He mumbled into her hair as his lips caught the tip of her ear in a kiss, "I will make you want me even more." And he did not think it, but he knew that was unfair of him… because soon he would be gone from her forever. _

_She trembled beneath his body, uncertainty and desire coursing through her veins. The heavy weight of him against her was agonizing, both not enough and too much at once. Her breath caught when he dragged his hands slowly up her back, beneath her shirt, and with one clever twist, her bra clasp released. He pulled back from her, smiled gently, and pulled his shirt off over his head. His body, taunt and built with years of use, loomed above her as he tossed his shirt from him. Hesitantly, she arched up and kissed his chest softly. Surprised, he jumped a little, and felt a tug in the pit of his stomach. She ran her smooth lips over the scars of his torso, kissed his abdomen with an open mouth, tasted his skin there, her hands clasped tightly at his sides. He pulled them from his body, taking her hands in his. He kissed each one sweetly, and then lifted them both above her head, pinning them against the floor with one hand. _

_Her chest was pounding, her breath came heavily, she'd never felt like this in her life! Cloud dragged the fingertips of his free hand up her side. Waves of emotion crashed through her. He leaned down, biting softly at the exposed flesh over her ribs. "Agh!" Tifa's cry came out hoarsely. She blushed at her own unexpected reaction. Her flesh tingled everywhere.. a throbbing deep inside of her kept growing in strength. He dragged his mouth across her stomach, lifting the end of her shirt up and he nuzzled the fabric higher. Tifa instinctively tried to lower her hands, but he still had them clasped tightly beneath his. He looked up into her eyes, and as she watched him, licked up beneath the loose garments, tenderly running over the bottom curve of her breast. Her chest heaved up without meaning to, as if inviting him to taste more. He let go of her hands, only to tear up her shirt and bra and regain possession of her wrists once more. _

_The bare, rosy peaks hardened at his gaze, and she trembled at a chill breeze brushing over them from the open window of their cabin in the sky. He dug his hips into hers, his hard protrusion grinding her. "Ahh…" Her moans aggravated his desire to capture her, and he dug into her again as he lowered his lips to taste the pink tips that shuddered beneath him. His lips opened, his tongue danced over it in lazy circles, his mouth sucked and the pull on Tifa's flesh felt heavenly, her hips instinctively rising to meet his as he rubbed against her. Her breath was coming hard and he growled lowly with his own pleasure. His grip tightened on her wrists, and then he bit her again, a little harder, rolling one of the rosy tips between his teeth. "Oh, g-god!" Tifa cried. He let go of her hands, and they instantly grabbed him by the hair as he dragged his tongue down her stomach. He reached up her skirt, nudged a hand between her thighs, and rubbed her through her panties. They were damp… _

_He briefly thought about entering her beneath her skirt but if this was the only time he'd ever be with her… he wanted to see all of her. He tugged her skirt off, her hands still gripping at his hair. She gasped as her panties were peeled away; and turned her head away from him, feeling awkward. "Tifa.." Cloud softly called. "Hey… look at me." She turned her head slightly, peeking at him. "You're beautiful." Her chest throbbed painfully, and she gasped loudly as he lowered his lips to her thighs, kissing them. He inched closer and closer to her center, her ragged breaths appeasing his ears. He flicked his tongue inside her folds, she groaned. He swept his tongue slowly back and forth over her, inside her, kissing places she didn't know existed on her own body. Her moans and pleas sounded foreign to her. Her head was swimming in all the foggy, delightful sensations. Suddenly, she felt something hard enter her. Cloud's finger worked its way in with ease, and he curled it inside of her as he tasted her most intimate of places. The throes of pleasure that filled her splashed across her flesh.. Her entire body ignited in fiery sparks that gathered from her core and suddenly exploded everywhere, through even her fingertips and toes as she arched up in silent rapture and then finally, screamed in agonizing pleasure. _

_She was vaguely conscious of Cloud kneeling before her as she struggled to breathe again. "You've been enjoying yourself…" he grinned, his eyes heatedly running over the flushed vision of passion in front of him. "Cloud.." she said weakly. "What is it," he ran his thumb up her jaw tenderly. She caught his hand, kissing it sweetly. He smiled. She opened her mouth and began to suck and nibble at the finger that had entered her. His aroused gasp was just loud enough for her to hear. She barely heard the sound of his zipper opening. He took her legs and wrapped them around his waist roughly, "do you know what you're doing?" He growled out at her, a scowl etched across his face as if he were angry with her. _

"_Cloud… please?" Tifa murmured, gazing up at him with watery, glistening eyes. He suddenly felt as if he'd been punched in the stomach as his hunger for her surged through him. It was inescapable now. _

_He lowered himself onto her naked body, his muscles tightening at the feel of her silky flesh sliding against his. He lowered his mouth onto hers, kissing her forcefully. Slowly, he pushed into her slick opening. She gasped, but he held his mouth over hers still, as if to take her cries of pain inside of him, swallowing them as if they never were. His hard, thick length pulsed against her and she realized he had not completely entered her. Her legs tightened around him as she felt him shift. He pushed into her further, and she cried out into his mouth again. He kissed her fiercely and plunged himself completely into her, the walls of her body tightly clasping him, molding to his girth. When he looked down at her, he realized she was crying. "Tifa…?" he breathed, willing himself to be still even as his body throbbed inside of hers, demanding more. _

"_Please… please… I want to be yours." She begged. He hesitated. She moved against him, her tight inner walls sliding around his manhood. A shaky breath escaped his lips. He thrust into her slowly. She moaned, the stinging sensation fading into pleasure at the soft slide of his skin against her insides. He thrust into her again, a little more forcefully, and at her pleas, began building up momentum. He kissed her wherever his lips could catch her body as she writhed in the pleasure that he was giving her. His excitement vaulted as she began to fall in sync with him, meeting his hips as he rocked into her. It was becoming harder to breathe, and he desperately held out as he slid in and out of the luscious goddess wrapped so tightly around him. He squeezed her long hair, grunting, and lowered his lips to taste the stiff peaks of her breasts. She bucked up to meet him with a shout in surprise at the added sensation. The muscles throughout his body rippled as he plunged into her, hardening in anticipation as she called his name, her body tightening against him. He could hold out no longer. He thrust into her rapidly, riding out an orgasm so deep, even his face tingled. She came, crying for him, begging for him, exactly when he burst inside of her, rocking his hips into her until the waves of ecstasy lulled. They lay, hearts pounding against each other's flesh, his body still imbedded inside of hers. _

_For the rest of his life, Cloud was certain; he would never be able to forget her calling his name like that. He never did._

He let go of one hand to grab her by the hips, digging his arousal into her lap as he hungrily fed on her mouth. She swept her hand over the back of his head and down his neck, caressing him lovingly. He broke the kiss instantly. A look of torment and pain filled his eyes. Their faces remained so close together, they breathed each other's exhalations. Cloud dropped Tifa's arms, hesitated, and then as quickly as he came to her, walked away.

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_**I know I've been a bad girl, but you must review! I'm insanely jealous of all the writers who get a bazillion reviews in one day… (-_-;) Plus, it's my first lemon, so you hafta!**_


	10. Chapter 9 The Fifth Reason: Betrayal

Chapter 9 - The Fifth Reason: Betrayal

_A/N: Thanks to my few but steadfast reviewers, I love Love LOVE you: __**cloudlover2989, POOnCHOCO, Kattzia, Phoebz, CLOUDxTIFAforever, and Sidney Blackwell.**__ Sorry for the last chapter being so confusing. Would it help if I inserted line breaks before & after the italics?? This chappie is short and not at all action packed. However, I think it's incredibly important and deserves to be a stand alone chapter. It reveals a lot about Cloud and his motives for behaving so oddly. The next chapter will continue with the actual plot. __**Oh yea, and, take a look at the poll I've started.**__ I'm in desperate need of some honest opinions about the subject of my next story because I'm not sure it's a very good idea or not. So please vote!!_

**Disclaimer: …need I say more?**

That was three years ago. It was the night before traveling into the depths of the Northern Crater to face Sephiroth in a bitter fight that Cloud was certain would only end in his own death. He didn't want to leave unfinished business behind for anyone. So he sent the whole crew home and stayed behind with Tifa. The conviction that he was living his final moments of life lead him to seek the most sincere fulfillment he could. He wanted his last memories to be saturated with the knowledge that she loved him and he loved her. It had been a happiness he'd always denied himself.

And then, unexpectedly, it had been the one thing Sephiroth could never have foreseen. That he knew how to love was a glitch. It made him a failure as a clone. But as he made love to her, she had done more than cut the ties to his puppet strings. She gave him hope. And he won. After wards, he realized with revulsion how selfish his actions had truly been. And using Tifa became one more thing he could never forgive himself for.

To this day, she did not know why he couldn't bring himself to be with her. He saw her pain in every glance, every gesture. He saw it everyday and he could barely stand it. It was because he could not ignore her and could not starve himself of her love, that those in-between moments occurred. The moments when the world stopped moving and everything went blissfully quiet: their kiss in the villa, every time he dreamt of her, when he'd almost kissed her again that morning as she attempted to wake him up. But every time he awoke from his quiet reverie, he found himself lost in her, his will entirely in her grasp, the puppet strings reattached by the very woman whose soft eyes beckoned to him in his sleep. Panic and anger would overwhelm him, and he'd staunchly resolve to try even harder to resist her. The cycle was laughably unprogressive. Each time he went to her, he intended to give her the kind of hope and love she'd filled him with when he defeated Sephiroth. And yet he found himself only leaving scars on her spirit whenever he reached for her. It was as if he was doomed to spend his life tormenting her so that he didn't break her. He was watching her drown, knowing that if he held onto her, she would only sink more quickly. No, he could not be forgiven. Especially for being so selfish that he could not bring himself to always stay away.

That he intended to prove his love for her and then simply die on her like all the rest of those she had loved, was his greatest betrayal. That she captured him, was hers. And that he could not help but be captured, was his great betrayal of himself.

It was three long years ago that Cloud had held Tifa for the first time, and last night as he took her in his arms once more, he could not help but return to that cherished memory. It provoked one conclusion: it was absolutely maddening to have so little control of himself – an abomination that she had so much.

**Please review! You can even do it anonymously!! … (;_;) I'm sorry I beg for reviews, they keep me motivated….**


	11. Chapter 10 Reno

Chapter 10 – Reno's Promise

_A/N: This update took a little longer than usual because I wasn't entirely sure how I wanted this chapter to progress. It was hard… _(T_T)_ Anyway, to make up Wutai culture, I mixed aspects of various Asian cultures. As a forewarning, I'm completely aware my Japanese grammar may not be perfect. Any questions, let me know. Thanks to all who reviewed: __**madelein, IHS, Shadori, Mizame, POOnCHOO, Phoebz, cloudlover2989, CLOUDxTIFAforever**_. _And to Mizame and Phoebz, your last comments did inspire me a bit in this chapter._

Tifa soaked in her bath. Its bubbles had slowly fizzed out of the water; its curls of steam long since evaporated. And still, she could not bring her weary body to rise from the aquatic cocoon. Hours of tossing and turning last night had rendered sleep as distant from her bed as the love of the man who laid only footsteps from her room. She could not make up her mind. Her body ached to go to him and seek their redemption together while the bitter disappointment that again wrenched her maimed little heart demanded she smite him with the almighty force of her Final Heaven. In the end, she had done neither but let her imagination take on the task of vigorously fulfilling both of those fantasies.

Now, however, that was not enough. As he carried off his packages to be delivered, she prepared for the night ahead, and those circumstances made both confrontation and avoidance obsolete. It was infuriating. In the end, she could do nothing.

For all the splendor of the traditional Wutai inn Yuffie had selected for her guests, Tifa was prevented from appreciating the intricacies of the gilded wall art, painted vases, and stunning architecture. Without even acknowledging the luxury of her spacious private bath, she'd filled the ishiburo and entered it, ignoring that it was big enough to double as a small pool. She had noticed that only a single large bed sat in the room, but shrugged, figuring it was well past big enough for both her and Marlene to sleep in. Why the hotel staff assumed Cloud would be staying with her, she did not know, but chalked it up to the general expectation that two adults living together with two kids would most probably be lovers, if not husband and wife. It was with some trepidation that she had to explain to the staff and have them change around the keycards. The concierge had raised an eyebrow, but merely complied.

At a knock at her bathroom door, Tifa was startled from her thoughts. "Uhm… is that you, Marlene?" A giggle. "Yuffie?" Another giggle. Tifa's brows furrowed in irritation. She rose from her bath, threw on the yukata draped over the carved mahogany chair in the corner, and swung open the door.

A pair of indistinguishable bodies in red kimono and red silk damask veils stood freakishly still. They were waiting, expectant, staring at her from beneath their headdresses. A cold sliver of horror crept into Tifa's stomach, her face paled to the color of stone. Just then, the familiar laughter erupting from the creepy twosome saved her from the mortification of running to hide beneath the bed. With a roll of her eyes, she snatched the Wutai wedding veils from Yuffie and Marlene's heads, reprimanding, "You know, given the history of this hotel, could you not give me the hibijeebees?!"

"I knew it, I knew it; you really were scared of that old ghost story. Bwahahaha! The scorned bride kills herself and comes back to this hotel to haunt the ancestors of the son of the innkeeper! You're way too easy, Tifa," Yuffie guffawed, as she gingerly swayed over to lie on the centuries old Wutai bed. Marlene followed her lead, albeit more stiffly in the unusual garb she wore. The four posts of the bed supported a carved wooden canopy and three walls of elaborate lattice work partially screened the deep red cushioning inside. The forth wall opened in a large semi-circle so that the occupants could enter and exit. The solitary bed had been the only thing Tifa had noticed upon entering the room. It looked as if it were made for wiling hours away in the arms of a secret lover. It was not a bed meant for sleep, but for repose. She felt that she'd never seen such a sensual bed in her life.

Tifa climbed inside, leaning back on the firm cushions. "Is that what you're wearing tonight," she asked, not entirely keeping the dubious lilt to her voice masked. Yuffie shook her head. "This is a traditional wedding dress and veil, but it's not meant for the engagement party. Pops wants me to wear a furisode kimono. That sucks. I mean, the sleeves are so long they touch the ground, how am I going to dance with Vinnie in that? So I decided I'd wear the furisode only for the banquet and the part where Vinnie gives the bridal gifts. Then, I'm going to change into the white mini dress I got with you and Marley for dancing."

"Sounds involved," Tifa grinned. The girl had everything planned for. "So, Cloud's still not going to come, is he?" Yuffie tried unsuccessfully not to sound miffed. Tifa responded in a low voice, "I don't think so, Yuf." The younger woman's eyes glazed over as if thinking about something else entirely, but she responded sharply, "You know, that guy… ano baka yarou! nanimo dekinaino yatsu! konna heya de sae, yatsume wa Tifa to kyoudou o tsukatteinai…" She burst out into a string of angry Wutai words, slapping furiously at the bed. A somber sounding foreign phrase followed, "mottainai na! Konna utsukushii beddo niwa, sonna utsukushii onnanohito noda…" *

Marlene quickly sat up. "What's all that supposed to mean??" Yuffie glanced over at her in surprise, "Oh! Uh, I'll teach you one day, ok sport?" At Tifa's own quizzical look, Yuffie hurriedly changed the subject. "We'd all better get ready, anyhow. There's an hour and a half before the banquet starts and I want to look dee-licious!" She forced a grin much too wide before getting out of the bed and rushing to the door. "I'll go get my dress maker to help me put on my kimono and then I'll be back! In the meantime, you guys should get ready and do your hair and makeup together! See ya soon!"

As Yuffie closed the door, Tifa and Marlene gazed at each other curiously. The same thought flitted through both their minds. What in the hell was that girl up to? Marlene was the first to break the bewildered stare. "Can I wear this dress to the party?" Tifa laughed. "I guess so, but don't you want to wear the dress we just bought you?"

Marlene sat and thought a minute. She _did _like her party dress, it was pink and frilly and she'd never worn anything so girly before. But this dress was kind of fun, too; and she would probably never get to wear one like it again. "Well – can't I wear this to the banquet and my dress to the party, like Yuffie?" Tifa smiled and nodded. Obviously, Marlene had developed a girl crush. She was happy it was someone like Yuffie – someone with a lot of energy and joy in her life, not someone like herself who kept losing her shit to a man far too careless with her heart.

The thought made her cringe. What kind of mother figure was she for Barret's daughter? She may have been a savior of the world, but she was weak-willed and self-conscious when it came to Cloud. Love could no longer be an acceptable excuse for her pitiable uncertainties. "Tifa, I love you." Marlene threw her little arms around Tifa's body in an instantaneous hug, returning peace to the beautiful warrior's soul. "I love you, too," she said, delicately placing a hand on the small girl's head, stoking her shiny brown hair. _That's right, _Tifa thought, _love should make you strong, should make you content. And I should love well the people who love me most. _

"Well," she pulled out of Marlene's grasp and looked her in the eye, "shall we?" Marlene shot up from the bed and hollered, "I'll go get my other dress!!"

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Yuffie stomped down the hall, her eyes trained on a door in the distance. Without knocking, she viciously pulled the door open, a scowl on her face of the sort that a stubborn, self-righteous 19 year old might have at hearing bad news. Rude was holding out the flame of a lighter to Reno's cigarette as the red-head leaned comfortably back onto the silk cushions of a low oriental couch, his bare skin visible beneath an unbuttoned white shirt. Both men turned their heads slightly askance at the intrusion. Reno took a long silent drag on his cigarette, eyes lazily observing Yuffie's huffing visage in his doorway. Finally, he cracked a smile and took another puff before tossing off a "what's up, crimson delight?"

"You!" Yuffie croaked through unreasonably oxygen restricted pipes. "Hmm?" Reno contentedly murmured, apparently all too used to angry women breaking and entering. "You, remember what we discussed about Tifa? Well, forget it! This is goddamned Tifa Lockheart, for pete'sake! You want her, right?" Reno's body stiffened, his eyes widened, and then he erupted into a coughing fit. Yuffie tapped her foot impatiently, waiting for him to get on with it already. He mustered an "of course" between gasps.

"Well then woo her, dammit! Show her the time of her life, make her forget all about that asshole, make her fall in love with you!!" Yuffie walked with deliberate steps to the couch, grabbed the cigarette out of Reno's slack mouth and leaned her face very close to his. "But I'm warning you, Reno. If you hurt her, if you can't love her back, if you leave her heartbroken, if you give her any cause for regret at all… I will end you," she murmured in deadly solemnity. Then she took a slow drag on the cigarette before flicking it at Reno's crotch. He quickly brushed it from his pants with a frantic swat and stepped on it lest she do it again. "Think you can handle that?" Yuffie commanded; half turned to walk out the door again. Reno looked up from the small burn hole in his pants and gave a devilishly handsome smile before responding, "I'd intended to, anyway."

She flounced from the room, leaving Reno and Rude to share a gaze of befuddled amusement. "She's not joking you know. Don't go grazing where the wild dogs are waiting…" At Reno's puzzled look, Rude decided to try the direct approach. "You'd have a lot more people to worry about than just Yuffie if you crossed Tifa Lockheart… So, maybe you should keep in mind that she's not joking."

Reno lit another cigarette, trained his gaze on the small orange flame and quietly responded, "I'm not either."

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She ran. She ran to the one place she knew could not fail to make her feel better. As he pulled her into his embrace; silently willing her breathless rage to calm, Yuffie sputtered in disbelief.

"I can't stand it! How could he? He knows; he's got to know that Tifa is in love with him. I HATE that he keeps stringing her along, all the while pretending that he's looking out for her, when we all know he's just looking out for his damn self!" Yuffie sobbed into Vincent's cloak. The deep inhalation of air that followed brought the pleasant, spicy aroma of Vincent Valentine to her notice. Her sudden awareness of his lean frame and strong arms wrapped all around her made her a little hot and fluttery inside.

"It's not always so easy to tell…" Vincent muttered deeply. Yuffie looked up at him hopefully. "You mean, you think Cloud might really love her? Do you know something!?" Vincent wrinkled his eyebrows in thought. "I mean to say that a man's heart is mysterious, sometimes even to himself."

Yuffie sighed, nestling in closer to the tantalizing body against her. "Well, I don't care about Cloud's feelings anymore. As her best friend, it's my duty to look out for Tifa, and if he won't step it up and go for it, then he shouldn't have her. He can't expect everyone else to wait around with bated breath for him to be ready." Vincent braced himself. He could tell she was about to say something he might not want to hear. He loved the girl for her fervor, but knew that she could be irrational and add fuel to fires already burning too hot. "So, that's why I told Reno he should take her away. Make her his. I'd originally thought that just telling Shera to set up Reno and Tifa would make Cloud change his mind about coming, that he'd definitely not let that happen. I was so sure that he'd insist on being Tifa's escort, but he didn't even try! And now that it's down to the wire and he still hasn't changed his mind, well, she's better off being with someone who really wants her, don't you think?"

Vincent dipped his head down to nibble on the tip of her ear before whispering, "And what if he does?" She trembled. "Then this will work, he won't be able to resist fighting for her when he sees Reno with Tifa. She's given him partial attention long enough. I say, may the best man win." Vincent clutched at the kimono his young lover wore, raising it up, up, up. When he dragged a hand up her bare thigh, she captured his mouth in a scorching kiss. They fell back on the bed together, and as he commenced his ministrations beneath her skirt, all thoughts about beautiful amazon girls, sly red heads, and hopeless emo boys became a blur.

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*Translation of Yuffie's outburst: that stupid bastard! That guy (derogatory) can't do anything! Even this room, he won't share it with Tifa… What a waste! Such a beautiful bed with such a beautiful woman in it…"

**Please review. Next chapter is the banquet!!! YAY, finally!!**


	12. Chap 11 Case of the Black Pinstripe Suit

**Chapter 11 – The Case of the Pinstripe Suit**

_A/N: I'm so, so sorry! Just so you know, I really don't plan on bailing on this story. In fact, I already have the ending written in rough draft, and I have all kinds of ideas for the chapters in between but it's really a matter of finding the time to perfect each chapter as I write it. Perfectionism is the bane of my existence, and I'm sorry to make it the bane of yours as well. Well, that, and I happen to be moving into my first house right now so that takes a lot of my time up, too. Anyway, thank you guys for reviewing the last chapter, I won't bother to mention names right now as I want to post this as soon as possible so you can stop hating me. O yea, and sorry for lying about this being the banquet chapter, I really thought it would be but then I had all these ideas… you know how those can get in the way sometimes. _

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"Kiwi!" Cloud nudged the peridot chocobo with his heel, reminding the bird he had a rider. The animal lifted his head from the gysahl greens he'd stopped to munch and ambled lazily forward. Silently, Cloud regretted not having the time to stop at his own stables and select a bird whose foibles he knew in and out. After breeding and training his own chocobos until their talents were optimized, he was no longer used to riding a steed that hadn't been thoroughly broken in and was more than mildly irritated to find that what the Sakura Ame's bird owned in speed and endurance was severely penalized by its excellent stupidity. Kiwi couldn't keep his feet in one direction and would stalk about in circles if Cloud let him. It had taken him hours longer than necessary to arrive at the bluff overlooking the village and now that he could finally see Wutai again, he was not in a mood to humor the bird any longer. Greens would have to wait until he could dismount the dummy.

A short, clumsy canter later, and the gates of the hotel's stables welcomed the travelers with open arms. There was a sigh of relief and a pat on Kiwi's neck in half-hearted gratitude. After dumping some fresh greens in the feeding bin, Cloud rubbed the chocobo down as he ate. Accustomed to seeing after his own birds, he didn't wait for the stable keeper to pitch out the old, used straw but set to work. When he tossed enough clean straw into the stall to satisfy himself, he gave the peridot bird one last pat and strode out towards the hotel entrance.

He would wash up, perhaps take a nap, and then see to the stables again about a gold he'd been promised could take him to Icicle Inn. He didn't have a package going there, but planned to take a few days off and enjoy some time snowboarding alone while Tifa and the kids enjoyed the festivities in Wutai. Once at the inn, he could exchange the promised steed for a fresh one to Bone Village and from there it was only a short ride on the back of another bird of uncertain capabilities back to Edge.

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The brunette smoothed back one last lock of glimmering, gold hued hair before pinning a cluster of brilliant white flowers to the base of her loosely gathered curls. The ringlets swayed about her shoulders romantically and she smiled with secret delight. The lingering, sweet fragrance of the petals in her coif did just as she hoped; they toned down the overt sexiness of her dress. Face framing locks that had escaped from her pins brought further attention to the delicate features of her visage.

Tifa dusted a bit of dewy pink blush across her cheeks, swiped on a couple coats of mascara and some shimmery gloss over her lips before announcing herself complete with her rise from the vanity stool. Marlene looked up dully from her storybook and squealed as Tifa exited the bathroom. "You look prettier than I've ever seen, Tifa! You're going to be the prettiest girl at Yuffie's banquet!! And you even did your hair the way Cloud likes it, the way you wore it to Cloud's birthday last year!" Suddenly, she could contain herself no longer, "I'm going to get Yuffie!" She dashed from the room as fast as her short little legs could carry her before Tifa could object.

Tifa frowned into the nearest mirror. She'd forgotten she wore her hair this way to Cloud's birthday… which was miraculous, really; considering that Cloud had tenderly drawn a glossy lock about his middle finger as he softly told her, "I like your hair." Tifa glared and just as she was about to viciously tug the tendrils from their binds, a knock at the door made her laugh.

Marlene hadn't yet mastered the precise swipe/open combination required to gain access to the room. She'd forgotten something, no doubt.

Happily smiling, Tifa opened the door fully expecting to pick the beloved girl up into her arms and smush her into a hug for all of her adorableness. "So happy to see me?" Reno smirked. Tifa's eyes shot open in surprise before she could collect herself with the remembrance that this was her date. She replaced the genuine smile with one that was more timid and awkward before saying, "Hi, Reno. Thanks for agreeing to be my – uh, escort for the night. …I – I guess you're ready to go??" she asked, flustered by his silence. As she nervously sputtered, Reno quietly took in the sight of her. Just as silently he realized she was more magnificent than he'd remembered. Strife could go scratch for all he cared. There was no way he was going to miss out on this opportunity even if he had formed a somewhat begrudged respect for Cloud.

Reno was momentarily caught off guard when he realized Tifa was awaiting a response of some kind, but with another cheeky grin his swagger returned. "Shall we, my lady?" he purred at her, holding out an elbow. The particular shade of pink that she turned as she wrapped her arm around his did not go unnoticed. He reveled in it.

She felt very silly as they walked down the hall arm in arm. Once inside the elevator, she glanced up at his face. He stared unenthusiastically at the gilded doors as the machination hummed to life and began their descent. Reno's lean, sturdy frame was decked out in its usual attire – the navy suit proclaiming him a Turk was the only variety he had and Tifa silently admitted it complimented him as she continued her curious inspection. The collar of his white shirt was unbuttoned and he wore no tie; his red hair was a little grown out and pieces fell into his eyes a bit. Tifa had never gotten a chance to look at the man before since whenever she'd come across him a fight was always about to commence, either against him or alongside him. She was surprised to discover that he was actually quite attractive in a dashing, hot blooded kind of way.

A little area of her brain that she did not completely govern began a comparison between the attractive merits of Cloud Strife versus Reno the Turk. The eyes… both had very pretty and yet very different eyes. Cloud's seemed to glow with a beautiful, eerie blue light and made her spine tingle with chills when they set upon her while Reno's eyes were more gray than blue and seemed to aggravate a flush of heat upon her cheeks when he gazed at her.

Those same gray irises slowly turned their attention on her and Tifa stared a bit longer before realizing that she had drawn his attention. She quickly looked at the floor – resisting her childish urge to pluck her arm from where he held it against his warm body. He laughed. "If you want a photograph to gaze at lovingly, I wouldn't deny you, Miss Lockheart. On one condition," he leaned in closer and stage whispered, "it's gotta be nude."

At Tifa's furious blush, he continued, encouraged. "The camera adds ten pounds and I think clothing makes me look fat, so it's naked or nothing, toots." Tifa burst out in laughter at the outrageousness of it all and Reno grinned, happy to find that the lovely Miss Lockheart had a sense of humor and relishing in the knowledge of being the cause of her fit of glee. The rest of the way down to the main entrance consisted of him making a gorgeous woman laugh. Not a bad start to his once in a lifetime opportunity, ne?

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Belatedly Cloud realized he smelled like bird poo. It was too late; too, too late. There was nothing he could do now but pass on by as the stunning beauty clutching his heart in her hand walked out onto the veranda arm in arm with another man. She was laughing, smiling like a beneficent queen at her adoring subjects. And oh, how they adored her. Reno's eyes ravaged every part of her over and over again as she greeted an unnaturally red faced Rude and a very eager Elena. Cloud had greedily taken in the sight of her several times before and could not stop himself from doing so now, either. And yet his soul ached with the knowledge that these impostors could not truly be as devoted to her as he was; that they did not love her for what they could not see.

He watched from a distance, staring forlornly at her lips. They had never given him pain – not in word, expression, or deed – until now. A revelation, that such a heavenly smile could be such sorrow. Not to mention the cocksure smirk of that red-headed son of a bitch – strutting around like Chanticleer amongst his harem.

As Cloud brewed these thoughts, he reluctantly took the first painful step forward, bracing himself for impending un-pleasantries. An ethereal voice tumbled out his name in a happy tune. Tifa called to him, waving.

_Run! RUN! _ He ignored his pleading instincts and trod slowly over to the grand veranda that wrapped around the pagoda where Tifa and the Turks waited. As he did, his eyes combed the length of her body and his muscles instantly contracted with the memory of that same woman against them not so very long ago. She smiled prettily as he climbed the steps towards her, "Denzel is waiting for you in his room upstairs. He wants to see you before you leave. And remember to say goodbye to Marley too, okay?" He shuffled awkwardly, shrugged, and stuffed his hands into his pockets.

She didn't seem to recall her former aggravation. This alarmed Cloud. Was she so inured to him throwing himself at her that she no longer saw it fit to discuss? Was it just a dream – that stretch of time ago that he'd held her in his arms as he pushed his length into the unexplored, most secretive of regions on her body as she cried out for him in a melody that haunted his ears in the midst of his dreams?? Was that the solitary moment when she'd ever wanted him so, needed him so??? Perhaps for her it was not a cherished memory at all, but something that just happened once.

"Tifa!!" Cloud's voice snapped sharply from his lips as she turned away from him. She jumped a little and quickly faced him again. The eyebrows crinkled worriedly over her cinnamon eyes questioned him silently. Cloud's mind was completely blank. His mouth hung open, awaiting his brain to deposit an appropriate excuse for calling out to her like that. His brain was taking an insupportably long time. "Move it, kid."

The gruff voice announced Cid's presence seconds before the rough shove that followed. Cloud stumbled forward, and Tifa moved to help him regain his balance. Their bodies met in an awkward embrace. A glance joined their eyes and they parted. His heart railed against his chest as she flushed and gazed at his filthy boots.

Reno's footsteps broke the excruciating silence as he strode over and confidently wrapped an arm about Tifa's bare shoulders. He whispered to her, "Now I'm a fan of Cloud's, too, but I'm not planning on losin' my date tonight." Her eyes widened before they danced with laughter. She spun around and clobbered Reno upside the head with an open hand, "would you knock it off!" Reno gave her a lopsided smile and put his hands in his pockets. Cloud glared at Reno and then at the offending arm. Reno winked. He offered Tifa his hand and led her away.

Cloud's jaw tightened and he took a step after them before a heavy hand grasped his shoulder roughly. "Whatcha starin' at, like a doggie at a danglin' biscuit?" Cid's eyes narrowed at Reno and Tifa as he spoke, taking a thoughtful drag on a smoke perched between his lips. His eyes flickered over the other Turks, and rested on Rude for a moment before releasing a gray puff of smoke from his slackened lips.

Cloud paused, staring at him for a moment. "Are you drunk?" Cid's eyes slide over in his general direction, "Not enuff, 'parently." The pilot hesitated a moment before continuing, "Are you?" Cloud's expression changed to one of confusion. "No." "Well then, least I havfa good excuse." He was a little bewildered but felt that somehow he knew what Cid was talking about. "C'mon. What ya need there is sum liquid courage, boy." Riddled with too many odd circumstances for one day, Cloud didn't object as the older man slung his arm around his neck and lead him towards the bar.

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An hour later, as he hurriedly dressed in the extra black pinstripe suit his friend had offered to let him use, Cloud somehow felt Vincent must know something. At first he didn't know why. But slowly wading through the drunken haze of his mind, he realized that it wasn't so much the surprising convenience of it all, but the small grin Vincent couldn't entirely manage to keep off of his face.

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**Don't punish me!** **Be nice and have pity!!**


	13. Chapter 12 Honesty

Chapter 12 – Honesty

**A/N: **I really am so sorry about the length of time it's been taking me to update, especially to the people who regularly review my chapters and those of you who last reviewed: **Mom calling, Jess9450, MADELEIN, Mizame, POOnCHOCO, Phoebz, CLOUDxTIFAforever, cloudlover2989, and the anonymous reviewer who chose to review via the name :)** LOL. Most of you already know why updates have been taking so long but for those of you not in the know, let's just make the long story short and say I'm going to Japan for a year and I leave in July and life has been very hectic lately besides. I know, I know. Excuses, excuses. A pro would never be so irresponsible!! Trust me, I probably hate myself for it more than you do. (T_T) Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter! **The ball is finally here! Will Cinderella finally lose her slipper to Prince Charming, or will she just lose her damn shoe, period? **Read on to find out!

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Cocktails and hors d'oeuvres had already been served and guests were just taking their seats for the entrée when Cloud had finally doused the last of his nerves with enough whiskey to render himself incapable of rational thought. Vaulted ceilings and the flickering amber of candlelight cast shadow puppets against the walls. Large papered doors were opened, allowing the sighing zephyrs of a mossy garden to cool the room. Chatter and tinkling of silver and crystal blended with soft, undulating music in an elegant cacophony, while waiters dressed to the nines in coat and tails served steaming hot sliced meats and sides from richly lacquered platters. Tifa delighted in everything, her heart going this way and that at every newly spotted detail. She scanned the room's visuals, awaiting the next surprise.

He stood alone. Eddies of people chatting and chuckling and swirling about him; he stood. The gay colors of their ensembles splashed and retreated against the deep, river rock black that enrobed him. His golden hair was haloed by the laughing candlelight and her heart briefly stopped before contracting in a slow, steady beat that she could hear in her ears. He was walking towards her, dashingly handsome with his broad shoulders and slim waist all outlined for her in a tailored suit. She felt the deep blue sea of his eyes alight on her before she met his gaze. Her lips felt swollen with the memory of his last kiss, and the longing to be kissed by him again.

Two little voices simultaneously screeched in surprise, "Cloud!" Denzel and Marlene sprinted into the arms of their guardian before Tifa realized with chagrin that she had quietly breathed out his name at the exact same instant as their infatuated cries. Reno dropped his knife with a clatter and startled, she glanced over at him. He was his usual, unassuming self as he drawled out, "You okay, Ms. Lockheart? You're lookin' awfully dazed. Can't blame you, seein' how you're sittin' next to the finest specimen of manhood this side of Wutai, tonight." Reno gave a lopsided grin and winked at her before returning to his normal voice, "Savor it, baby." Abashed, Tifa smiled.

"Ha, you haven't touched your food. Would you like me to feed you," he put on the Cosmo Canyon accent again, " Seein' as how I'm obviously the cause of your malnourishment, it's only fair." Without waiting for her response, Reno's cowboy version of himself took Tifa's plate and began to cut her filet mignon for her, jabbering on about his dead sexiness and her evident state of distress over it and prompting her to smile. He raised her fork to his lips and tasted a morsel from her plate. Stabbing another piece, he grinned at her before cooling the bite with a blow of his lips and holding the fork to her mouth saying, "Taste it. You'll like it." She hesitated. Even if she had not been conscience that Cloud was watching them as he strolled towards their table with two kids who adored him swinging from his arms, she would not have been sure what to do in a situation like this. "I- I… uhm, okay?" She answered weakly in question format. It felt wrong somehow for her eat that morsel from that fork, but she parted her lips just slightly, prepared to take it anyway.

Cloud pulled his chair from the table with a loud scraping on the floor. He sat down directly in front of her, eyes glowering, challenging her wordlessly. She closed her mouth. "Why, if it isn't Cloud Strife! You're just my absolute hero! May I have your autograph?" Reno sing-songed in a prissy voice; more accurate to the reality of Cloud's sudden fame than he knew. Tifa muffled a laugh, _so this is a Turk. Master of assassination. Hah! _She glanced at Reno's expectant face as he held out pad and paper to Cloud and felt suddenly very glad that the Turk was here tonight.

Cloud grabbed the pen and blearily stared at the blank paper for a moment before slowly drawling out in his own mock Canyon, "I'd like to oblige you, suh, but the truth is I cain't right recawl how to spell my name at this time…" Tifa shuddered quietly with gleeful surprise until see saw Cloud quickly scrawl out his 'autograph' on the pad. She wiped tears from her eyes and burst out in a loud fit of laughter as Reno took it from him with a brief, quizzical glance. It read, _Dork._ Reno grinned and tucked the pad away inside his jacket. "I'll jest put that away for safe keepin' now." He looked down affectionately at the brunette beside him, still wiping tears from her face and catching her breath before offering, "May I get you a drink, laughing lady?" The sincerity etched into the deep tone of his voice was startling. She smiled warmly at the realization that Reno was genuinely pleased to see her happy. Tifa nodded, a tendril of hair bronzed by candlelight sweeping across her shoulder as she did. Cloud stared and did not wait for Reno to depart from the table before making his admiration openly known.

"And there it is… the key to the world." Cloud grinned, sipping from his glass. Tifa's eyes shot up at him, catching his look. His cerulean stare sent a shuddering wave down her spine, icy fingertips feathering a trail from vertebrae to vertebrae. "Wars would be fought and won just to see that smile. You must be the most beautiful thing in the world, Tifa Lockheart."

Despite the blush flattery had splashed across her cheeks, she could not help but bitterly think, _Is that all I am?_ She hated the woozy feeling overcoming her, as if she had been staring too long at the sun.A streak of anger unaffected by the soft embrace of Cloud's words welled to the forefront. _Is that it? After all this time and everything that has happened between us, the only thing you can see when you look at me is how pretty I am. To you, that is all that defines me. It's no wonder you don't love me… You barely even know me._

Her stomach curling knots inside of her, she rose from her chair. Cloud quickly rose from his seat as well, a long since forgotten chivalry afforded to ladies. She started past him, not glancing his way. He shot out his arm and caught her wrist. She tried to jerk her arm away with an angry look and a sharp word on her lips. The expression of pained confusion on his face made her voice die away and it was then that a nauseating wave of self-realization filled her. The clear blue of his eyes and sunshine blonde of his hair, the paleness of his opal skin against the jet black of his shirt and tie, the strength knotted up in his form beneath the pin-striped suit: it all accused her of her own guilt. For _every time_ she looked at him, it was like looking at the sun; falling in love with the most brilliant thing on the planet and the agony of knowing that that terrible beauty would never belong to her. She was Narcissus in the reflecting pool and Echo, as well. What could she blame him for that she was not guilty of?

"Cloud!" He tightened his grip on her arm. She chewed her lip and before she changed her mind, she rapidly spat out, "What do you like about me?" He murmured, drawing her in towards the warmth of his body. "Everything."

She caught the sour odor of whiskey on his breath and frowned at his vagueness. Right then it didn't matter if Cloud was drunk, she needed him to be specific and more importantly, she needed to be specific with herself. That desperation drove her on to blather in maddeningly close proximity to him, "I like your courage, and your loyalty, how strong you try to be to protect all of us and that you'll sacrifice yourself to keep us safe. I like that when you get angry, you walk away so you don't hurt anyone with the things you want to say. I like that you're overly serious about everything because you never want to be caught unprepared. I like that you don't say much but when you do talk, it's always something I feel I should listen carefully to. There's almost nothing that I don't like about you, Cloud, but there _is _something. I hate that you have never made it clear what you think about me."

Determination set in her eyes, Tifa waited for him. Waited to hear something out of him that would change the way she felt about him forever, one way or the other. She wanted to know something concrete about them because there were just too many in-betweens.

Cloud gazed at her, his lips so close to her face that his breath tickled her when he opened his mouth to speak.

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Hey YOU! Review, review, review!! And while you're telling me about how much you hate/love/dontcareabout my story, give me some tips on how I can make it better, what kinds of things you'd like to see in the plot, and tell me WHY you think more people don't review my story? (Oh, the pain, the pain!)


	14. Chapter 13 Bargain with the Devil

Chapter 13 – Bargain with the Devil

_A/N: It's a short one, but necessary to the plot. I figured you'd rather me update more quickly than wait for a longer chapter. DON'T KILL ME OR YOU'LL NEVER FIND OUT HOW IT ENDS! MWAHAHAHHAHA! __**PLEASE READ THIS**__**: **__Itt's come to my attention that there's an M-rated story out there that's seemingly lifted a couple of details directly from my own story. While the similarities are a bit irritating, I'm not sure what I should do about it. If you read it and concur that some of the story seems strangely like mine, let me know as I may decide to take action. Also, due to some feedback, I was thinking of changing the title of this story, what do you guys think?__******_

_As always, thanks for reviewing: __**Kattzia**__ (I think it's a bit cheesy too, but a necessary evil, LOL), __**ColinatorGX**__ (I find I'm more honest when I'm drunk, so why not Cloud?), __**anonymous **__(I have plans for another, but only when this one is complete), __**arj4y**__, __**cloudlover2989**__, __**beaucoup riant**__ (love the name, no idea what it means…),__and a very special thanks to __**Phoebz, Mizame, POOnCHOCO, CLOUDxTIFAforever, momcalling **__who always review or in the case of mom calling, review back to back. Thanks guys! _

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Reno scowled. He was not having a good night. Why the fuck did Strife have to come and bust up his flow? His presence alone was distracting Tifa and even from where the Turk stood at the bar waiting for his drinks to be served, he could tell that something unlikely to bring him luck with her was happening. He had caught Cloud's comment about Tifa's smile just as he was leaving the table, but when she had started away, he thought his position with her was safe enough for the moment. Now that Cloud was pulling _his_ banging date closer to him, Reno felt he might be losing a battle before he knew he was fighting one.

The bartender placed two glasses of champagne on the counter before him and Reno hurriedly spun around with them in his hand to go and rescue his date. "Why, thank you, Reno. Such a gentleman." The silky smooth voice greeted him exactly as the blonde woman hijacked one of the glasses and pressed her red lips to the rim, partaking of a gift not meant for her. "Scarlet." Reno said curtly, grimacing as she sipped. "You'll excuse me," he muttered, attempting to make a quick get away with the remaining glass.

"Tifa's, I presume?" The edge in her voice halted him. He looked at her over his shoulder, cursing his own curiosity. Judging by the glint in her steely eyes, there was something Scarlet knew that she was willing to share with him if he was willing to make a trade. He glanced across the room in Tifa's direction and cut to the chase, "What do you want?"

"You know, judging from the state Cloud is in tonight, he'll need a room to stay in. All I want is to negotiate a room change. " She sipped at her glass.

"You want me to give up my room to Cloud? What for?" Reno asked quizzically. "Technically I want you to give up your room to me. I'll handle the rest of the details," Scarlet replied in clipped tones. Reno sensed he was not allowed to pry and since his attention – still cast in Tifa's direction – was cut necessarily short, he only asked, "What do you know?"

"Mr. Strife has had scandalous relations with a certain woman that he'd rather not let his old childhood friend know about. Namely, me." Reno's eyes were ripped from Tifa's sight as he gaped at the older woman. Her blonde hair was tied up in a knot at the back of her neck, her blue eyes and red lips mimicking fire and ice, and her svelte figure was curved and flaunted in all the right places beneath a tight red dress with a slit dangerously high up the leg. She was about ten years older than Cloud, but quite the middle-aged beauty and Reno could believe that most men would want to sleep with her despite her shrewdness. She continued with a quiet smile, "You can imagine why he wouldn't want her to find out."

Reno nodded, lifting his keycard from his pocket and holding it out to her. She took it between her gloved fingers and smiling, slinked away. He caught sight of Cloud pulling Tifa even closer to him and decided it was high time he go and considerably improve his chances with the lady Lockheart.

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She could remember Cloud's performance in bed vividly and was sure he remembered her. No one really ever forgot their first time, but his was a little more interesting than most. He was 17, she was an older woman, and he was her subordinate. Scarlet had always had an eye out for the sweet young things that came through the doors of SOLDIER, full of dreams and courage and naivety. They were also all rigorously trained, which made their bodies hard and their endurance surpassed that of most men. She also had a thing for virgins.

But when she laid eyes on Cloud, his golden hair, soft aqua eyes, full of shyness yet built like a machine, she felt that she must have him. She had planned to dominate him, just as she did all the virgins she seduced, but his aptitude was suprising. Cloud learned very quickly, adjusting to her desires and needs with the simplest of commands, almost predicting what she wanted. It was the first time a virgin had made her come first, screaming for more, and he became the only virgin she'd allow to fuck her after she'd devirginized him.

Having Cloud fuck her became almost like an addiction; she's sneak off whenever she could to have just a little bit more. She knew it was dangerous. Whenever he touched her, she felt herself lose control completely and he could make her come two or even three times before he came at all. She began to feel as if no one else could sate her, his vibrancy and experimental nature ended up dominating her. He was the best she ever had.

It was purely sexual, but sometimes it was so fantastic that she screamed out that she loved him while in the convulsions of the pleasure he wrought on her. So it was with obvious displeasure that SOLDIER eventually dispatched him to Nibelheim, and the task to find a new lovers to temporarily take his place fell upon her. When he did not return, she was deeply displeased and perhaps even a little sad. He had been more than an excellent lover, he had been a sweet and gentle boy who she had come to a fondness of.

So when he came back to Junon years later, in the prescence of a brunette beauty looking as if she'd been made for sex, her jealousy did not completely take her by surprise. Scarlet was satisfied only by the knowledge that the bitch would soon die. However, Cloud had rescued the beauty from the gas chamber, and Scarlet could not contain her hatred any longer.

She chased the girl down like a madman, and to this day the most satisfying smack she'd ever delivered had been that one she'd given Tifa. Her stomach still turned bitter when she recalled the moment, for a series of slaps to her own face had followed. But more than that, what turned her stomach was the look of stony anger etched into Cloud's expression, the only look he had greeted her with after their long separation. It was as if he'd never known her. A far cry from the affectionate, post-coital gazes he'd gifted her with.

She had never suspected Cloud to love her, but she did feel that his affection for her was genuine, and the pure fury in his hard blue eyes that day made her long for him to look at her with affection again.

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